A Year of Blessing.



As we hunker down for the next couple of weeks before we leave for AZ where I will have my surgery, how grateful I am for this time to spend with you. It's been awhile but we've been a bit busy with Laurie's graduation (with honors), and helping Laurie, Stephen and Kasey move into their new home here in Colorado. It's been so long since they've been able to live together as a family but now are able to do so. Laurie and Stephen have about 8 or 9 months before they will be separated again by deployment, at which point our RV will go into storage and we will move into their home to help Laurie with Kasey since her hours are going to be quite difficult and Stephen said our help would be greatly appreciated. Then, when she is done with this second part of her program, she will do her officer training and be deployed also. Sigh.
But the year behind us has been perhaps one of the most unusual in our lives, if not one of the most blessed. Stephen's deployment - and once more, his safe return. Laurie's school, and her successful conclusion of a murderous schedule. Selling our home without even needing a realtor.
My retirement - and the blessing of knowing that I was happy in my job every single day of the years I worked there and loved every one of my co workers. The RV - and our travels. Seeing some of this beautiful country and taking in it's splendor without having words to describe it. And after leaving Scott in Hamburg, watching him make some of the best decisions of his life.
But the greatest blessing perhaps, have been our days with Kasey. Having him for 10 months, being his guardians, was a time when God reached down and blessed us more than you can possibly imagine.
This year now passing into a new decade was one which had it's struggles as well. But as we look to the year ahead, Ron and I can't imagine having a year more blessed than 2009. It keeps us faithful in prayer and sure in the knowledge that a loving God is watching over us all and keeping us in His care.
I hope, and pray, that as you look at the year ahead, you have much to be grateful for in the year just past. Know also that each of you are a blessing to me.
May you be blessed my friends with happiness and good health.
And may God bless our troops and those who love them.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Never Forget.

No matter how many years pass...may we keep in our hearts:

December 7th, 1941.

A BIG week.

We have arrived at our destination city - and we'll be hugging Laurie tonight.
In just a week, Laurie will graduate and Stephen and Kasey, and Ron and I will be there with bells on. And of course, I will be wearing my Two Star pin as well as my American Flag pin. Are we excited? More excited than you could ever guess. We'll take the kids out for lunch afterward and then come back to the RV and let them have some time alone to celebrate this awesome time in their lives...seeing a year behind them which seemed so long when the journey began.
Funny thing, the man who pulled in next to us in the RV park yesterday is an Army vet who served time in Vietnam as a medic. He received his training at the same school Laurie is going to right now. Small world, isn't it? I thank God for all the stories out there waiting for us to hear about our country's military and our veterans.
When we were watching Fox news this morning, there were a group of former Miss Americas and a Miss Utah (herself a SGT in the Army) who went to Afghanistan to visit the troops for Thanksgiving. They briefly interviewed a young woman who said that she was going home soon and said into the microphone, "I love you Buddy, mommy will be home soon." I cried...couldn't help it because it was a reminder, hopefully for those who do not have anyone serving, that it's not just about war, but about sacrifice. Prayerfully, those who don't agree with the war understand the seriousness with which our military takes their commitment - that they don't just take orders, but look for them to do what they are there to do - complete their mission.
I've always realized that it's not just my children who face separations, it's countless thousands of men and women who are away from their families. No matter where they serve, however long it takes, they get the job done.
Awesome, aren't they?
God bless them all and those who wait.

COMMITMENT.... and ADOPTION.


Laurie is very nearly finished with the first phase of her program - the most difficult part which is the exam and bookwork part of it. In keeping with my privacy policy of not giving out too much specific information about my soldiers, I can only say that the program is unique, nearly impossible, (both to get into and to stay in) and very demanding. Most soldiers need to be there without their families to make it through....which is maybe the most difficult part of it all. This is why we had guardianship of Kasey during the year that Stephen was deployed. Most students who have their family with them do not fare as well in their exam grades - many do not make it.
For the entire time she has been in school, Laurie has found that getting up in the wee hours of the morning to study has been easier than cramming til midnight and then getting up to go to school. She has found that she is just too tired at night to do more than two hours of studying and have it stay with her. But the year's nearly over and she will be returning home to live with Stephen and Kasey very soon where she will complete the second part of the program. We are so proud of their commitment to each other and to their goals - not an easy thing to be loyal to the demands of the Army and to their marriage with all the demands of their career. But there will be a time of adjustment for them all no doubt. It's been a time of constant prayer for this mom and grandma..
Along the way, in our conversations with Laurie, she has mentioned many of her friends. Some because she has taken an afternoon to go to a movie with one of them, others because they are having issues with classes or exams. It's' nice to think that she has good friends with whom she can commiserate and study with. Sunday night she told me she was going to study for a little while with a girl who needed to get a 92 on Monday's exam to pass the course. So I added a few prayers for her friend Emily - not to mention an extra prayer for Laurie that she would concentrate on the exam and not on how Emily was doing.
Last night I got an email - Laurie got 98 and Emily got the grade she needed as well. One more exam tomorrow and they will be done.
After I read the email from Laurie I found that I was giving thanks for two young women - my own soldier and another young woman I have never met. Not that my little prayers made the difference, but it was the fact that, along the way, in Laurie's military career, God has brought us in touch with so many soldiers and their families who we come to know - some only through Laurie mentioning them.
So is it all about adoption of these families? Maybe not.
I think it's just a deep respect we have for the commitment these young men and women have, and the sacrifices they make which endear them to us.
Whatever it is, and whether we ever meet or not, Ron and I are thankful for their presence in our children's lives, and feel privileged to "know" them all...if only through conversations with the Father of us all.
God bless our troops - and those who love them.

Prayers for all at Fort Hood.


Many, many prayers go out for the victims of yesterday's shooting at Fort Hood. May their families be comforted by our Father's care and love. And may they know that they are not alone as they worry about those loved ones who were injured, or as they grieve for those lost.
We are all grieving.
And praying.

Seems Like Yesterday.



Tonight we are in a peaceful campground in Kentucky....less than 100 miles from a place we visited often - Fort Knox. Laurie was stationed there for 3 years and we made the trip between Hamburg and Fort Knox more times than we could count. Yesterday and today, as we drove through Ohio, many memories of those drives came flooding back - they always do, don't they?
As we passed countless exits, there were many memories down those ramps. The town where Laurie always stopped for the night when she was driving home; the exit we took one cold December 23rd as we drove Laurie home for Christmas....in a snow storm that could not be believed. I remember to this day, the coziness of the motel room, the safety and peace Ron and Laurie and I felt being off the highway and warm and dry; of being able to tuck Laurie in and crawl into bed next to Ron...exhausted, but happy to be where we were - all together.
And there was the time when I drove by myself to visit her after she had been in an accident. A mom thing, you know? But we had a good time - and when I left to drive back home, I was so grateful for those days we'd had as mom and daughter.
This afternoon, as we crossed one of my favorite bridges which led from Cincinatti into Kentucky, I saw the sign I'd read tons of times...WELCOME TO KENTUCKY! It was always the second best part of the trip...the best of course when we pulled up to her barracks and saw her running down the stairs to greet us, or the smile on her face when she opened the door to her room and saw us.
Tomorrow, as we complete our trip to my sister's in TN, we'll go through some of the towns where Laurie would lead us to her favorite places for dinner - O'Charleys being one of them. Of course we will be in a hurry to get to our destination so no stopping at O'Charleys for lunch, but that won't stop the memories from coming back. Mmmmm...those fresh rolls, still warm from the oven and basted with honey butter.
Life is good - and memories sure help to make it so. Tomorrow when we go through Louisville, I will remember the night in 2002 when we took Laurie to pick up her new boyfriend from the airport. We were all there for the wedding of a friend of Laurie's and it would be the first time we would meet this new young man Laurie seemed quite smitten with. His name was Stephen. Laurie glowed all over as we walked through the airport with him, and I knew this was the man she would marry - and told her very quietly at the baggage claim that I thought I had just met my future son in law. We both cried a bit....and only 3 months later, he proposed to her.
See - does a mom know, or what? Sometimes, YES, we do. Isn't that cool?
The memories and the blessings keep flooding back - as though it was yesterday.
Thank you, Lord. For those days and all the days since.
God bless our troops, and those who wait.

Reconnecting.

We've been here in Western NY for a week now - visiting with family and friends...squeezing in as many visits as we can before we leave next week. How good it is to see the autumn colors here in WNY. Sure, we saw them along the way too, but they somehow can't compare to autumn colors on the trees that line the streets of your hometown. Last week Monday, after we got settled at the campground, we headed over to Scott's place. He had just walked Veronica home from school and she was having some pudding in the kitchen. Quietly, Ron walked to the kitchen doorway and stood there as she was intent on eating her pudding. Scott said, "Binker, look who's here," and she looked up. When she saw Ron, she whispered, "Papa!" and by the time she was halfway across the room she was crying and laughing at the same time. She leapt into Ron's arms to hug him and then she saw me and tried to hug us both at the same time. Hard for her chubby little 5 year old arms, but she did a very good job of it. It was a moment to cherish and there wasn't a dry eye to be found. Scott looks awesome - he got his hair cut recently for Locks for Love - it had been really loooong - trust me on that...but he looks great and is happy he had it done. A smile on his face often now, he is making good choices and some really nice changes which will make life easier - and more affordable - for him. He doesn't have a whole lot of extra cash, but is getting better at managing his budget. This will make leaving next week a little bit easier on this mom's heart and mind.

We've been making some great improvements to the RV as well...putting in a small electric fireplace and a catalytic heater, both of which will help us keep the RV warm at a lower cost. The furnaces which come with RVs generally operate on propane and are vented outside. This means that half the heat escapes through the outside vent and is using a lot of propane. So we have two other means of heating the trailer now which will cost less and will more than pay for the investment within the first year. Since we will be in Arizona during the winter, we'll need to use the heat then too. So Ron has done an awesome job improving our coziness factor. The nights and early mornings can get downright cold at this time of year. We'll continue to use the furnace for heating the bathroom in the morning or at night when we shower - it makes the bathroom like a sauna. This I can handle. :)

I'm a sweatshirt or flannel shirt girl, actually. I like to be cozy. As soon as the temps go below 55, that's cold enough for a sweatshirt or one of Ron's flannel shirts. How funny it is that he has three bags of flannel shirts waiting to go in the closet - and I already know my favorites - the ones I love to put on over a turtleneck. Those will hang all the way over to the left of Ron's shirts; right next to where my winter clothes start. I figure someone should wear them 'cause he can't possibly use them all.

Old friends, new friends - people who have blessed my life for various periods of time...seeing so many of them all this last week has been such a blessing.
And I continue to be amazed at the people who enter my life via the wonder of internet. Today I got an email from an old friend - (not old in the literal sense) -he used to date my sister in high school. It was great to hear from you again, Bruce...keep in touch, ok? Funny how people re-connect isn't it? You log into classmates.com and find so many people who played an important part of your life when you were young. Kids you saw every day - with whom you used to walk the halls of high school between classes when you were supposed to be hurrying to the next class; carrying on conversations which caused you to slide into your seat just as the bell rang. Good times, not always easy, but a time when it was easier to be a teenager than it is now. The world was still outside the high school doors, and we went back out into it at the close of each day, but somehow it didn't offer the temptations that teens deal with today...maybe they were there, but we didn't know about them. Or knew, but weren't tempted by them. Or were tempted, but didn't give in. Kind of complicated, huh?

One last thing that I thought would be the most difficult part of our trip back home...seeing the house that was our home for 29 years. The lady has made some pretty significant changes - at least on the outside, but it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. Somehow, I think this is because the years we had there with the kids - including our grandkids - were so happy. It doesn't bother me to see the changes because the memories of our time there are still so fresh. I wish the new owner many years of blessing in the house which is now her home.

God has been gracious to us - and to our family. So much ahead...and so many blessings we have to be grateful for - including all of you.

May He bless our troops - and those who wait.

Wonderful Friends, and A Great Place on a Great Lake.

I can't believe it's been so long since I posted here. We've been on the road since September 16th - have seen some of the most beautiful areas of our country. It's been a great trip so far - and thankfully, we will be in Buffalo by Monday.

The last couple of days we have been in Milwaukee visiting good friends. Nancy, her husband Jim, their great kids and grandkids, and our friend Wendy as well. Nancy and Wendy and I have been friends for a long time - all of us being Military Moms...Nancy is a veteran's mom now but the connection remains. We are three moms who met in our military moms chat room, and will always be friends. We see each other infrequently, but our friendship is steadfast. And every time we do get together, as my friend Wendy said today, it's like we pick up where we left off. And that's a very good thing.

And so, Nancy gave us a tour of Milwaukee today - and a great tour it was. We saw the beautiful old buildings downtown, the waterfront which could teach many major cities a lot about how to build up one of their greatest assets - Lake Michigan.

Tonight, we prepare to leave this city - packing up again and putting breakables in their travel mode - wrapped in dish towels and ready to sit in the kitchen sink for a few hours while they bump along on the highway. We'll head out soon after rush hour traffic has thinned out a bit, and travel another day as we head closer to home....well, what we always will consider our home..until we are done traveling and are in an apartment somewhere.

My friend Nancy always tells us Milwaukee is a great place on a great lake. I agree - but it's people like her and Jim, and my other friend Wendy who make it so.

Military moms have a kinship - we have been brought together by our children's service, and blessed by God to be friends forever. I have so many friends - GOOD friends - with whom I share this bond. Some are moms of soldiers, others spouses, even widows of soldiers who sacrificed all they had to give.

I cherish you all.

Blessings my friends.

On This Day.....

We all have a story, don't we?

On this day 8 years ago, I sat at my desk in the University at Buffalo Financial Aid Office, processing financial aid documents for students who had filed them late. We were already into the fall semester, and the busy-ness of the summer semester (always our busiest time) was behind us. I looked outside at a glorious day - blue skies, warm temperatures and a soft breeze came through the open window next to me. All of a sudden, my friend came back from the front of the office and announced that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center and I immediately called Ron who was at home watching CNN and FOX News as he still does in the morning. We put the TV on in the conference room and all of us took turns watching it. I knew that Laurie was not at her duty station at Fort Knox, but rather at another post across the country for some training. Someone had a radio which was always on during the day - not loud enough most days for anyone else to hear, but suddenly, on that same (normally quiet) radio, we all could hear the terrible news as it unfolded. It was unthinkable to know what was happening and when the Pentagon was hit, it became very personal to me since Laurie had met many soldiers from the Pentagon at an NCO training course only weeks earlier. My mind immediately envisioned the graduation program and the names of the soldiers and their home bases. I can still see 'Pentagon' listed so many times.

My fear then was, 'what was Laurie hearing so far from home?' And was Scott listening at his new apartment, or watching this on TV? My prayer was that my children were not afraid - not as afraid as their mom was at that moment.

We heard that students were crowded around the TVs in the Student Union - so many of our student population were from NYC and their thoughts must have been so far away from classwork. At 1 pm, Governor Pataki announced the closing of UB for the day and we all went home to watch the morning's terrible events on TV.

Laurie called bot Ron and I when she was able to, knowing that we would be worried about what was going on where she was. She couldn't talk long but we at least heard her voice....and Scott's shortly after hers.

Laurie said that they had been given updates all morning long and that although they were supposed to leave the next morning, with the airlines not operating it would be several days before she could go "home." Scott was frightened beyond words and eventually he realized that his greatest fear was because he knew his sister no longer served in a time of peace.
I think my most lasting vision of that day was the dust and destruction surrounding those buildings...and the empty fire and rescue trucks buried in that rubble...of wondering where the occupants of those trucks had gone; of the surviving firemen sitting on the curbs in total shock.

It's all personal - yet shared by us all - what the events of that day mean to us.

May God be with the families of those lost that day...and protect those who still work to keep it from happening again - from the President, to our military, the fire and police men and women, right down to each American citizen.

May He bless us all.

Looking Back - and Ahead.

It's been a little over 3 years since I sat down at my computer and began this blog. It's been a journey of ups and downs, but all of the twists and turns, and each one of the steps along the path have been blessed by God. Stephen has returned from the sand, Laurie is in the top third of her class, and we have had a wonderful 10 month adventure with a little boy named Kasey.

Being a Two Star Mom is very important to me. But we have Scott back home in Buffalo, and his little 5 year old daughter - our granddaughter Veronica. We affectionately call her Binker - although I have no idea how our family came up with that nickname. And then there is Luke - our 12 year old grandson - our former daughter in law's son by her first husband and whose picture will be added to the ones above when we have a new one of him. Seven years ago when Scott and Tina married he became our grandson (actually we loved him from the moment we met him)- and he always will be. Divorce changes things, but not our love for the children involved in our lives. Things haven't been easy for Scott recently, but are looking up now and it's really going to be nice to spend some time with him as he makes his own plans and to let him know that we believe in him just as we believe in what Laurie and Stephen do.

In my very first post in July of 2006, I said, 'It’s not just about the soldiers, but about the soldier’s sibling - your son, and the things going on in his life.'
True to that statement, next week we will leave this beautiful state and travel back to Buffalo to see Scott, and Veronica, and Luke. We have been blessed by God's grace and He has given us good health and modest means - enough to travel where we like across this great country and still be able to travel back "home" (far apart but two states are home to us now) to see our children and grandchildren as often as we like. When parents have two children (actually, three counting Stephen), they want to be involved in all of their lives. And yet, we know when to bow out for awhile. Stephen and Kasey are fine here - a happy little boy who adores his daddy...and a daddy who is content in all of that, and proud of his wife who is working so hard to achieve a goal not easily reached. I am not looking forward to leaving our boys for 3 months, but we are getting excited at the thought of seeing Scott and the kids. Once a mom and grandma, always a mom and grandma. It will be good to see our friends, to sit in my favorite pew at church with my good friend Betty, to worship with my Christian family, and listen to our Pastor's awesome sermons. Not to mention that to travel with Ron is always a unique experience in itself - we do love our road trips. I am so thankful for his sense of humor. We are both working on patience. :)

Lily has finally become a contented doggie. She knows this is home, I think. Of course she will be wondering what gives next week when we take our "show" on the road again. Sometimes we look at her and you can almost see it in her eyes or read it in the way she cocks her ears...."why did you people leave a perfectly good house with a deck with warm sunbeams shining on it (perfect for naps), and lots of room to play?" Other times I think if she could talk she would just say, "are you kidding me???" She hears me say that all the time. :)

And tomorrow is my last session with my physical therapist - my physical therapist's husband just left for his deployment. She is kind of young, but not a stranger to deployment as this is the third time they have experienced it.

About 18 months ago, when we knew Stephen's deployment was imminent, we were visiting Laurie and Stephen and Kasey when they were on temporary duty away from here. As always, they made the best of it.

One day while we were there, Laurie had to go over on post to the PX and I wandered into one of the little boutiques outside the main PX and came across some military pins. One in particular caught my eye - it was a typical yellow ribbon pin, but with a charm of the Army star attached. I bought it and wore it nearly every single day when Stephen was deployed. It didn't matter if I was dressed up, or dressed down. The pin went on and I wore it over my heart, along with my two star pin. It now lies on the table here next to me and I figure I have a few good choices as to what to do with the pin: I could put it in my keepsake box as a momento of this time in our lives when God blessed us so by bringing Stephen home safely. Perhaps I could continue wearing it in support of our still deployed troops.

Or I could give it to my physical therapist - to let her know that she isn't alone, and that this mom of two soldiers cares about her soldier and appreciates his sacrifices and hers as well. And that is what I will do tomorrow. I can leave a bit of who I am behind me. I will probably never see this young woman again, but I will think of her often, and her husband too.

And so, as life does, we move forward - never forgetting to look back at the blessings and to be thankful for the present.

God is so good.

May He bless you.

Taking Chance

Sunday afternoon, we walked into a video store to rent some movies. As Ron filled out the paperwork for a membership card, I began perusing the movies. It's been quite some time since we've rented movies and I was happy to see there were many new titles to chose from. When I came upon 'Taking Chance,'
I took it off the shelf and read the back of the box. It wouldn't be an easy movie to watch but I handed it to Ron as he joined me.
If you aren't familiar with the title, it's about a Marine officer who volunteers to accompany the body of a young marine who was killed in Iraq as he is returned home for his burial. The movie is riveting, and very emotional. Ron and I sat and watched it, and more often than not, tears streamed down our faces.
It is a movie which celebrates the spirit of Americans - their respect and admiration not only for a young marine, but for the officer who accompanied him on his final journey home.
Ron said he had wanted to see it but wanted to wait until Stephen was safely home. Still without giving anything away, the movie brought back the time in our lives when Stephen returned home from another deployment....9 days prior to the death of this young man in the province previously occupied by Stephen's unit. I remember how the violence picked up in the days following Stephen's return...and the prayers, both for Stephen's safe return and for those young Marines who had taken over.
As I mentioned, it is not an easy movie to watch - but because it is a true story the difficulty becomes a blessing as the viewer witnesses the respect and reverence given to the young Marine on his way home...and to the man who goes with him.
And it also brings home the memory of my friend Wendy's son who accompanied the body of his best friend home from Iraq 15 months ago. No, being a military mom isn't always easy - but it is a amazing to see the devotion and loyalty our children have toward their comrades. The heartache becomes a blessing as we see the values instilled in these men and women despite the personal cost.
My friend Nancy says this movie should be required viewing for all military families. Its' message is carried throughout the movie...and continues to hit home long after the DVD player is turned off. She also has a personal friend who has just been assigned as Chaplain at Dover AF base where returning heroes go after they have paid the ultimate price for freedom and before their final journey home. Please pray for Chaplain Sorensen as he assumes his new post and for all the heroes he receives...and the families who wait for them to return home one last time.
May God be with all who work at Dover Air Force base - who do their jobs daily not with obligation, but as a labor of love. And may He bless all those who bring our heroes to their final resting place, and the families they bring them to.
God bless our troops, and those who wait.

With Mission Accomplished, We Begin Again.



At 7:45 last night, following the very last notes of Proud to be an American, the double doors opened, and in a cloud of dust, 160 American warriors marched into the packed event room. And with tears of joy, relief, and pride, Ron and I realized that the greatest blessing a military parent can experience was ours once again. Stephen had come home safely from the sands of a place far, far, away. Laurie had arrived here the night before and we were so thankful that while trying to make it through a program so intense, only God's will could have helped the Army's plan and had allowed her to be here at that moment. We let the tears of joy, pride, and relief fall; and whatever fear had been hiding in our hearts for the past year fell away with those tears. And as we observed a moment of silence for those who had given the ultimate sacrifice, I knew that but for the Grace of God, those prayers would have been for our soldier. We sang The National Anthem and the Army Song and then they were dismissed to their families. Ron and I started snapping pictures immediately as Stephen and Laurie, who was holding on to a slightly overwhelmed Kasey - made their way through the masses to find each other. And when they did, no amount of film could capture the love in that moment.
Eventually, we made our way outside, Stephen got his bags from the bus, and we made our way to where we had parked the pick-ups. Final hugs and kisses, and they piled into their truck, we into ours - and drove away in separate directions. Even as the distance grew between us, their happiness followed our truck like a sunbeam - even in the darkness of the evening hours.
Ron told me I had done well during the ceremony - meaning I had cried, but had maintained my composure. :) With his words, the floodgates opened. And I said. "the toys are all at home but the little boy will be missing" Of course, referring to Kasey.
When we got home, I hugged Ron and said, "well, it's just us two again, but we accomplished OUR mission too."
For ten months, one of the first sounds we heard in the morning was Kasey's little voice. Happy or grumpy, it was a sound we treasured. Do you remember those days back in October? The "honeymoon" period of the first few days of his settling in, the moments of trying to consoling Kasey's homesick little heart, the difficult moments in the morning when pre school didn't seem an acceptable option to him. I remember those "difficult" mornings when, after dropping Kasey at school, I prayed for strength and guidance on my way to work...knowing that Ron and I had a blessed (but awesome task) in front of us. And all the while askng God to remind me that this was a 3 year old boy - far from his mommy; and that his daddy was even further away - "getting the bad guys, grandma."
But the days rolled into weeks, and then months. And soon enough, it was Christmas and Kasey had both of his parents with him to celebrate the holiday. They had nearly two weeks together as a family. And, as Laurie and Stephen once again had to go their separate ways, they left with knowing our selling the house and moving into our on the road home was just ahead - and with us would be Kasey and we would all be waiting for Stephen when he arrived home.
And so, here we are. The first morning of our new life. Just how many journeys is a couple our age blessed enough to travel?
There will be other days with Kasey - times when we could be asked once again to be his guardians. Because the US Army is what it is. Unpredictable - but like no other.
And I smile now because I know that in a hotel not too far from here, a little family is getting to know each other again after so long apart. And the smile is also because we have had this wonderful gift from God - a mission He so graciously led us through.

My heart will always have a yellow ribbon tied around it for the men and women who are still deployed, or are looking at their orders to go to the mountains of Afghanistan or the sands of Iraq.
My last words to you this morning would be to say THANK YOU. For your prayers, your help, your encouragement along the way.
For your appreciation of what it has meant to Ron and me.
I ask you for one more prayer - of thanksgiving - that after this awesome and amazing year, God's grace has allowed me to remain...
A Two Star Mom.

Do One Armed Hugs Count?



Well, if you read my other blog, you know that I had a mishap on Tuesday and my left arm is now in a cast from the elbow down to my top knuckles of my hand, compliments of a broken arm. One of these days I will have this tumor on my auditory canal removed so that my sense of balance returns to normal. Then, perhaps, I can walk and maintain solid footing. After all, if we are ever going to stand on that new fangled platform above the Grand Canyon good balance is important. Do you agree? :)
So, anyway, as I was lying on the gurney in the ER the other night, I said to Ron, "How am I ever going to give Stephen a normal hug when he gets home with this cast on my arm?" Ron said he thinks he will understand and he said he is sure that Stephen will do his best not to make mockery of my grace and ability to get into trouble (or a cast). At least for the first 2 minutes after we see him.
So, do you think my hug will do? I think I can squeeze the daylights out of him just as well with one arm, as opposed to two...don't you agree?
Yeah sure. But as long as he knows what my heart is saying with that hug, I think being a one armed mom for awhile is just fine.
God bless our troops - and those of us who wait.

Can I Call You When Daddy Comes Home?


The other day, Ron and Kasey were talking about the fact that Stephen will be home soon. Kasey was happy, of course, but then got very pensive. Ron said, "what's wrong, Buddy?"
And Kasey said, "But Grandpa....can I call you when my daddy gets home?"
Ron told him that we would BE HERE when his daddy comes home. And Kasey said,
"No, No. I mean after daddy gets home and you and grandma go to live in the desert, can I still call and talk to you and grandma?" I guess we've grown on him a bit in the last 9 months. This makes me smile.
He's been asking a lot lately why we have to go live in the desert (Arizona). Ron doesn't really have a better answer other than, "well, Buddy, that's where Grandma and Grandpa want to be for the winter." (jury is still out on that one as far as grandma is concerned :). Grandma sure wouldn't mind a Colorado winter...very few snow storms in this area of CO. So this will be up for discussion in the weeks to come.
When I hear Kasey's little voice asking such serious questions - and telling us that he will miss us, I am so grateful for the wonderful experience we've had with Kasey. The ups and a fair amount of downs too as Kasey has grown into a more independent little boy, have kept us happy and busy and fulfilled.
"Can I call you when my daddy comes home?"
Kasey, there won't be a moment when we won't be thinking of you and hoping to hear your little voice. It's a sound I could never do without.
Thank you, Lord for the blessing of this little boy.
God bless our troops, and those who wait.

As Beautiful as Ever.


This morning, Ron and I were driving about town, and always, the mountains were in view. They are so majestic - and it caused me to remember that America the Beautiful was inspired by a visit to the top of a mountain here in CO. As I thought about that, it brought to mind 9/11. and perhaps one of the most poignant moments of that day. It was when so many of our government leaders - of both parties - gathered on the Capital steps in Washington DC and sang God Bless America- united in the tragedy that our nation had endured that day. I have a lot of trouble singing those songs because of the lump that forms in my throat and the tears that cloud my eyes. But I always manage to get through them.
We are a proud nation - hopefully not a boastful pride - but a pride which makes our hearts swell with thanksgiving at being one of America's citizens. And when I see our military men and women dressed in their BDUs, going around town - banking, shopping, errands that we all do - it just causes me to be proud of all of them. Over and over again.
And when I look at them I wonder...is he or she a veteran of the Iraqi war? Are they scheduled for deployment? Do they have children who have missed them - or who will need to say goodbye in the near future?
We all do our part to keep America who she is, live good lives and help one another if a need arises. But the men and women in the Armed Forces give a lot more. Some of their sacrifices are known by those of us who love them, but even we can't grasp the magnitude of everything they have given up...including the families of those who have given the ultimate sacrifice. They give their lives every single day...may their families know it is not in vain. Nor will they ever be forgotten.
This is because the America they fight and die for is still free. And beautiful.
God bless our troops and those who love them.
Thanks for stopping by.
Sue

NO MORE MAIL!!


After a week at Laurie's, and then three HOT days on the road, we are finally at our home base and are waiting for news on when Stephen will be coming home. Saturday when we were on our way to the zoo, Laurie's cell phone rang and it was Stephen. NO MORE MAIL!
THIS is a good thing as anyone who has ever had a loved one deployed can tell you. And so, now that we are where we want to be for a couple of months, we will have some fun with Kasey, do some shopping and finish unpacking the trailer. I have quite a bit of wall space so there will be plenty of room for my patriotic wall hangings. Call this mom happy and finally, after a rough few months, I think we are content. Scott will be here later this month, Laurie will also have leave in August, and they will stay here. So we are allowing ourselves one free day tomorrow, then begin the fun part of decorating and the rest of the unpacking.
Kasey is so excited to be here. Such a lot this little boy has been through in the past 10 months.

I must admit, there have been times during these last few weeks when I can honestly tell you I thought we were crazy to do this full time RVing thing. But God is good - He knows just how much we can handle and stops at that.
So now, instead of writing letters, I can start writing my lists and planning Stephen's welcome home dinner. Right here, in our RV. At home.
God bless our troops...and those who wait.
Blessings,
Sue

Banner's Up!!


Hello dear friends. Today we became residents of South Dakota. The people at the DMV office were quite nice, and my picture doesn't look too bad. I kept my eyes open so this is good. But I think I look like a chipmunk.
At any rate, it feels kind of weird...but at least the plan is going quite smoothly. On our way through IL yesterday, we stopped at a store and I bought some little suction cup thingies that you put on windows for wind catchers. And of course, for Blue Star Banners. And so, this two star mom has finally put up my two star banner...it's in the back "picture" window of our RV for all the world to see. I had looked for-and found-the box I had packed it in on the first day I unpacked...but couldn't find the suction cup thingy which I know I packed with it. So I finally just bought some more and hung the banner today. I must say, I feel more at home now.
We are having a pretty good time, although there is a lot of work involved in moving into an RV from a house. Kasey is having a ball - is such a good traveler and stays awake most of the day but does take a good nap sometime in mid afternoon. I miss his little jibber jabbering for those couple of hours.
Tonight, as on all the other nights we have spent in the trailer, Kasey is sleeping with us - as is Lily. The sofa bed still has a few boxes on it and the bed is big enough for all of us. I think there is a bit of comfort for all of us in this. But tomorrow, I will be able to clear the sofa so he can sleep in his own bed tomorrow night. Our time with him is quickly passing - and I won't get into that or I won't be able to finish this post without some tears. Last night Ron was talking about when we are on our own and of course I teared up at the thought. Ron said he's pretty sure Stephen and Laurie would notice if we tried to keep him. Funny.
So, here we are...we are home tonight because we are in our RV in our new state. By Saturday we will be gone and on our way to see Laurie. This is a great thing for us all.
As our troops in the sand get closer to that date that is in the news, please pray for them...for God's hedge of protection to be all around them - and that those who wait will feel that assurance of God's protection around their loved ones.
Be blessed my friends.

New Journeys...




The house is sold, the ink on the last signature of our closing papers long since dried, and we have been living in a motel for a week now. The check has cleared the bank and we pick up our brand new fifth wheel on Saturday. By Sunday afternoon, we should be on our way west.
Sounds good, right? Yes, and it's also good to see the plan in black and white. But it's also a bit of a challenge. An emotional challenge for this mom.
Coming home from dinner tonight, I realized that all the "things" which make our town comfortable will remain here....and we will be finding new comforts in every mile we travel, in every town, or forest, or RV park we call "home" for however long we stay, and in those quiet nights in campgrounds hundreds of miles from Western NY. We will travel far and wide...east to west, north to south and back again to the North (but not in the winter :) and somewhere along the way I will get used to it all. And find the comfort that I found here in Western NY for 62 years. Nothing will change - I will be Ron's wife, mom to Scott, and to Laurie, and to her Stephen as well, and Kasey and Veronica and Luke's gram. But in a different place.
And of course, I will be a two star mom. When Ron and I left our house on closing day, the last thing I did was to take down the yellow ribbons from the trees in the front yard. Ron insisted that I not save them....and that new ribbons will adorn our RV. I felt a little sad about that, but he was probably right...they had gone through a heck of a western NY winter, a windy and rainy spring, and looked pretty much done for.
Tomorrow I will go to the local Bath and Body Works and fill a basket with some things for the teachers at Kasey's school. They have been great to us all...and in fact today Kasey came "home" with 2 Father's Day gifts...one labeled 'Dad,' another 'Grandpa.' The same thing happened for Mother's Day...mom and grandma packages. So I'd like them to know that we appreciate their understanding Kasey's unique situation these last nearly 8 months. They've always allowed him to talk about his mom and dad and his grandma and grandpa, and how his daddy is getting the bad guys and mommy is learning something that she will be able to do for a long long time...even when she is out of the army.
He has grown up a lot - I know I mentioned that in my last post. And we have been the blessed witnesses to that.
And so, our new adventure is beginning. Oh, I am still Two Star Mom....guess I probably always will be if Laurie and Stephen don't change their plans.
Wherever the journey takes us, however long the Lord will allow it to be, we are hoping for fun, and knowledge, and, well, comfort.
Ron said it all in one sentance this afternoon...."We live in a great country. It's time to see it all."
And just think, you get to see it with us. :)
God bless our troops and those who wait.

From Toddler to Little Boy.

So many wonderful blessings have come our way these past 7 plus months since Kasey came to live with us. And, of course, challenges as well. Lately, just in the last few weeks, he has changed. When he first arrived, Moosey - a huge stuffed moose that I...ummm, that Santa gave him in Christmas of 07...was his constant companion. Bedtime pal, extra pillow when he turned himself around in bed at night, and just plain friend. Although it was gradual, Kasey began leaving Moosey behind when he went to bed at night...would say "oh yeah" when I asked him if he wanted him in bed. But now, Moosey remains in Kasey's toybox and he takes his hotwheels cars to bed. :) A few, and within reason. Which averages out to be 7 or 8. Now that we are all sleeping in one room - Kasey on his thick quilt on the rug in our bedroom and us on the mattress on the floor - when I wake during the night as I always do, I often hear noises. I hear the sounds of Kasey...mumbling in his sleep, turning over, and the sound of his hot wheels turning over as well. It's a funny thing, but comforting as well, to hear these things in the middle of the night. It means that yes, my boy is still warm and cozy and sleeping like a log.

And he is also more independent - takes more showers instead of baths - supervised by one of us to make sure he doesn't slip in the shower, and of course with a pair of orange goggles to protect his little eyes from the baby shampoo. Funny. (We've gone through an awful lot of that in the past couple of weeks since he's been doing this himself). And we've noticed in the last couple of weeks a spontaneity in hugs and kisses. When he first arrived, if we would ask him for a kiss, he would put his head down and let us kiss the top of his head. Now, he holds up his little face for a kiss...those wet little kisseys that I love because his face is so adorable as he is puckering up to plant the kiss.

And the hugs...not just a quick hug that sometimes misses entirely, but a real hug - both arms held there in a good hug that says I love you. Sometimes, I stop and think of the fact that in less than 3 months, he will be back at home with his daddy - this 11 month time of blessing which seemed so scary, wonderful, overwhelming all at the same time when we first began this journey- will be over. Now, I think only of the blessing - the confidence and trust Laurie and Stephen placed in us that day when Kasey was still a baby as they asked us to sign the family care forms in case their Army commitments ever required them to both be gone at the same time. From 3 year old toddler, to 4 year old little boy - and to think we are living these days with him.

And yet, I can't wait until his mommy and daddy can have him back - not that I am anxious to give him back...but that they can experience this wonderful little boy once again. Thank you, Lord...and please keep his daddy safe in the sand, and his mommy steadfast in her studies.

God, please bless our troops...and those who wait.

The Faces of War



The other night, just as I was putting my laptop to sleep for the night, I noticed that I had a new email from Laurie...the subject line: Picture of Stephen!
Opening it, her words to Stephen's mom, to Ron, and to me were that she found a picture of Stephen on her FRG website. She was so thrilled to see it. It was an action picture - apparently taken during a mission. And while I shared my daughter's thankfulness at finding the one picture out of God only knows how many out there in cyberspace with a picture of her beloved soldier, it also made me cry. (you know how I am). I opened the picture and clicked on it to give me a zoom in, and sure enough, there he was. Now, my first words to that picture were, "Oh Stephen." And the next? Through tears, my prayer, Dear Lord, please bring our soldier home safely to us.
It brings the war too close to home...puts a personal face on it that I cherish...and yet, the loneliness that I feel for him and for Laurie and Kasey. Their loneliness for each other. He is but one soldier in more than one hundred thousand US troops now serving over in the sand. But he is OUR soldier, just as all the men and women over there belong to someone. They belong to many people - and all of them are ours. As individuals, and as a nation.
President Obama said on Memorial Day at Arlington National Cemetary, they are the very best our country has to give.
God bless them all - those faces across the sea, and those who serve at home.

Quiet moments.


I love those last few moments before Kasey gets tucked in to bed at night. The busy-ness of the day is left behind and the time for reading stories and saying prayers becomes a haven for this grandma. That's just it - after a long day for both of us, Kasey and I settle into who we really are - a boy and his grandma. It's our time to put behind us whatever stressors have made their unwelcome presence into our day. For me, those include this waiting for our closing to be done on our house, or the times I've had to raise my voice to a little boy who is being just that, a little boy. 'Eat your peas, Kasey.' 'No more chocolate milk until you have some bites of chicken, Kasey.'
'Please wash your hands, Kasey." Etc., etc., etc. (sigh).
For Kasey, it's putting the time outs he may have had at school behind him, or the words he may have said to grandma or grandpa which got him in trouble...all those moments which make a day upsetting to a 4 year old boy.
Tonight, the pain in my ribs was really bothering me but I wanted to read Kasey a story about Lightening McQueen and his ever present friend Mater the Tow Truck. When he saw that I was in a great deal of discomfort, he filled in the blanks...knows the book by heart...and recited it word for word just by memory and looking at the pictures. After the book, it's time to tell Kasey a story. He always tells me what the story should be about, and leaves the rest to grandma. :)
In those quiet moments, we also say Kasey's prayers - blessing everyone he can think of including 4 legged creatures he (we) love. Tonight we did a little detour from the prayers as he mentioned his doggie Mya and how he will see her when we visit Laurie in July. He can't wait - the love for her (and his mommy) brightening his little face with a beautiful smile.
We asked God to bless his daddy - and a side conversation with a quivering lip as he asked me why his daddy has to be in Iraq. My own lip quivered as I told him his daddy and all the other soldiers over there are brave and wonderful people who believe in making sure everyone is safe from the bad guys.
As we got near the end of his prayers, he was a little restless and I mentioned to him that when we talk to Jesus we should always pay attention to what we are saying. Which prompted a conversation about how Jesus died - "are those the same bad guys where daddy is grandma?"
(No, Kasey, but people are still not understanding why Jesus died which doesn't make them bad, just not understanding about Jesus).
In the end, we adjust his covers, turn the right nightlights on which allow him to read his book one last time for the day, and we say "Night Night, I love you" about 4 times until he is done asking last minute questions.
And I walk down the hallway....not feeling like a guardian at all.
Finally, I am just grandma. And I smile...just as I am smiling now.
God bless our troops and those who love them. Especially their children, who wait -and wonder just how long it will be before it isn't grandma who says their prayers with them, but their mommies and daddies.

Because of the Brave

This is definitely a weekend when all military families reflect on the freedom our nation so cherishes - and even more, on the loved ones who keep us free. There's not a whole lot to it - plain and simple, we are free because of the brave.

We are ever so mindful of who to thank. Those who serve now, those who have served in the past, and especially those who have sacrificed everything - even their very lives - so that we may remain free.

It's a belief. A treasure we have been given; and something we can all too easily take for granted if we don't set our hearts in the right place.

What will you do this weekend to honor them? We will hopefully talk to Stephen - more importantly KASEY will talk to Stephen. We will also have our daily conversations with Laurie (and more importantly KASEY will talk to Laurie). And wherever we go, as we pass the flag dotted cemetaries, we will thank God for all who give today - all who gave so much in the past.

There is a certain pride that is in the hearts of Americans - not a boastful pride, but rather an appreciative pride. It allows us to stop and think - to be thankful for this land we live in. Not for the material things we have, but for the principle on which this nation was founded. For our freedom to worship, and speak, to be together in our ideals and opinions - or to differ in them.

I give you thanks, dear Lord, for our freedom. For these men and women who have given so much for so many years.

Since the beginning of time, there has been strife in this world. And therefore, warriors. Great differences in warriors, though, have made the struggles different as well. In America, we fight for Freedom - here on our soil, and wherever it needs to be defended.

In the hearts of our American warriors dwell committment, loyalty, courage, and if truth be told, fear. May Faith also dwell there as well. ALWAYS, may they know that God is with them.

God bless you and this land of the free we call home.

Connections



We are still waiting for a new closing date - a date that actually sticks this time - so this morning, I had just a few more things to go through before I could say I was satisfied with what I saved and what I couldn't keep. I have this notebook type album made by a good friend a long time ago. It's a red notebook with patriotic cloth covering it and the words "Military Moms" on it. Inside, many pages of postcards from military moms I have "met" over the years via this wonderful blessing called the internet. Some have remained good and close friends, some are easy to remember and make me smile in doing so, but are no longer part of our military moms website and we have lost touch; and others who have left the mms website are still good friends. A few years back, maybe 5 or 6 years ago, we had a group who decided to have a postcard exchange - we sent postcards from our home cities to each other and we gathered quite a nice collection - these are the postcards I found today in the notebook. Going through the pages of the book today and looking at the postcards from all over this great country, it made me smile.
My Two Star Banner is now packed away in a box and safely inside a uhaul, but it will be one of the first things I unpack when we have our new home and are sitting in a campground. I anticipate all the new friends who are out there - military parents those who see our Two Star banner and realize that they have found other military parents who can understand the sacrifices made, the fears they have, the pride.
I am grateful for the connections that make this roller coaster ride such a blessing - and if you are reading my words right now, I am grateful for YOU.
God bless our troops and those who love them.

Stars and Stripes Forever.

Well, since today seemed to be a pretty good day pain-wise, I thought it would be a good day to pack/sort/pitch the stuff in my linen closets. I only needed help with the top shelves - had nurse Ron pull those things down to my level for me. I sorted through the sheets and tablecloths and cloth napkins - so many were inherited from my mom and Ron's mom and Laurie had asked if I could give her some of them (gladly Laurie), so I went through them all. In doing so, I remembered the tables our moms used to set - with the ample and steaming bowls of mashed potatoes, and vegetables with cheese sauce or butter, perfect salads, and platters of meat - and full to the brim gravy boats sitting next to them. Dinner rolls - mmmm good - with REAL butter.

Anyway, it was a good project for today. A nice box of memories will go in the trailer with Laurie's name on it.

Of course it also meant going through the tons - ok, not tons, but LOTS - of dishtowels I have built up over the years. Some of the towels I've b0ught found their way into scrub buckets filled with Murphy's Oil Soap or Mr. Clean, and I found a few more that qualify for Mr. Murphy during today's task. But oh my gosh - I never realized how many patriotic towels I've bought, and been given, over the last 10 years or so since Laurie went into the military. Stars, stripes, patriotic hearts, lighthouses with flags offering a symbol of "light" as well. (Karen, I thought of you when I put them in the "save" pile, and figured you probably have some which are similar. Then there were the several navy blue and white checked towels with the patriotic hearts on them - Kim and Linda - I remember those with the mugs you gave me (the mugs are amongst those going with us - they made "the cut":). And the red and blue towels with white stars on them which Laurie bought in our favorite gift shop near one of her past duty stations where she and I did some of our best shopping with Ron's blessing - well, ok, maybe not with his blessing, but with his credit card. (Isn't that the same thing?).

And so, even though our patriotically themed wallpaper was stripped last month for the soon to be new owner of our home, the things that made this house our home - the touches that define who we are - will go with us. I am smiling here.

Stars and Stripes Forever? You bet.

God bless those who fight for those stars and stripes - and those of us who wave them proudly as we wait.

Ummm, Doc, can you help me please?


Hmmm. No, this isn't a repeat post. Last night, I had an early dinner (soup, sandwich PLAIN lemonade) with my friend and her little 8 month old daughter (she's gorgeous and friendly and smiley) and then stopped at Tim Horton's for some decaf coffee and some donut holes for Kasey.
When I got home, Kasey was talking to his mommy. Happy that I hadn't missed her call, I put my stuff down and went over to sit down. Kasey was just saying his goodbyes so I took the phone when he handed it to me and started talking to Laurie. Enter KLUTZ. I lost my balance as I was sitting down in the chair. The rest is kind of a blur...I fell, hitting my back on the cement ledge around the fireplace, bounced off the ledge and landed on the floor. Couldn't breathe, couldn't talk, couldn't holler for help or tell Laurie I was ok. I could hear Laurie saying - "hello, hello - are you there, mom?" And then I heard Kasey say to Ron, "what's the matter with Grandma? " Enter Sir Lancelot (Ron) who was asking me why I was on the floor, why I couldn't talk, what was the matter with me. One word answer: "FELL!" I couldn't tell him what happened - he just thought I fell. So, he hung up the phone - Laurie had hung up by then and two seconds later the phone rang and it was her - she thought she got disconnected. Ron told her that her mother fell and was trying to decide whether or not to get up off the floor.
So he said that I would talk to her today.
Enter pain. Shock is gone, pain is setting in. I got to the couch - Kasey runs to get his favorite blankie and says, "here grandma, this will make you cozy." (Don't you LOVE little kids? They offer so much comfort in so few words).
Long story short, I went to bed at 10 pm, woke up at 1:30 am and Ron helped me out to the recliner where I slept for four hours. This morning I felt better except for the spasms of pain in my rib cage. One visit to my favorite family doctor in the whole wide world, a visit to the xray place, and voila! 2 broken ribs, but my lung wasn't punctured.
Six weeks and I should be fine. But he gave me a couple of prescriptions for meds. He did say the packing, traveling, etc., wasn't going to be easy. Oh, well. When I think of how serious it could have been, it's really ok.
Today is Laurie's birthday - 29 for the first time. How did so many years go by? We called her first thing this morning so Kasey could say Happy Birthday to mommy. She had gotten her birthday box yesterday so that was the first thing she did when she got up. (this from the girl who said 'I don't need a THING.') I love sending birthday surprises, don't you? Even if they don't need anything - it's important to say to them: I NEED to tell you that I love you on your birthday and always.
Ron and Kasey should be home soon with Kasey's movies for the weekend. Bless his heart - and his grandpa's too. How blessed am I to have them here? No words to describe that blessing.
Have a good weekend everyone.
Message to self: try to stay upright. :)
God bless our troops.

Branching out!

It seemed inappropriate to include all my travel adventures here on Two Star Mom. This is, after all, a blog created to honor my two soldiers and all of our military and their families. Being part of a military family is a unique honor - a roller coaster adventure in itself.
And I have a feeling that being on the road full time in an RV will also be unique - a real trip. Pardon the pun, please.
In any case, I made the plunge and created another blog for the traveler in me to use. It's called - Living the Dream - I THINK!
I tried to insert the shortcut into this post but wasn't successful, and so if you'd like to visit, the link is in my profile. Ironically. although I struggle with Two Star Mom in trying to post links and shortcuts, I have been able to set up a link list - still incomplete - on my new blog. That is a big YAY!! since so many of you have been visiting me for so long and I couldn't figure out how to send others to your sites. Problem solved, or so it seems. If your site isn't there yet, it will be soon.
I will still be here as Two Star Mom, but I'll be hanging the two star banner in our fifth wheel trailer and taking it on the road. I hope you visit once in awhile to see where we are - hmmm, does that sound like I don't know where we are going?
One last thing for this morning's post and it has nothing to do with blue star banners or RVing. It's all about health and the flu epidemic that is beginning to move across our nation, and the world. Be safe, be cautious, be alert for the signs of this disease in your family or others. All of you are a blessing to me and I'd like you to stay healthy and happy. These are precautions that we will take as well - so that branching out and moving on can become reality.
God's blessings my friends and God bless our troops.

So, What's Up Doc?



This is a post I have been praying I could make for a couple of weeks.
It all started a few weeks ago with a hearing test at an ear, nose, and throat specialist. I've been having so much trouble hearing out of my right ear - it's been a gradual hearing loss, but definitely more prounounced in the last several months. It was getting to the point that nearly everything couldn't be heard, or if I did hear someone speaking all the words were garbled. So, before we headed out and before my health insurance switched over, I thought I would have it checked out. I flunked the hearing test miserably, more than that - because everything is garbled - the ENT dr. asked me to have an MRI to rule out a rare type of benign tumor that causes the symptoms I've been having. I had the MRI the next morning - got the results last week. The doc comes into the room and said, "you're the lady who's going to travel in an RV, aren't you?" And I said, "Yup...aren't I?" (there was something about the way he asked the question). And then he told me he was going to throw a monkey wrench into our plans because guess what? I am one of those one in 100,000 people who get this rare type of benign tumor. He told me it's on my brain but it's really small. Three methods of treatment: watch it with MRIs, radiation, or surgery. Enter shock and awe. And tears. So I go home and tell Ron I have a tumor, and got an appointment with a neuro surgeon.
The appointment was this morning and the news was good - find a good primary MD when we get to our home base, and then have him refer me to a good neurologist who will monitor it for me. The tumor is on the nerve to my auditory canal - not actually on the brain. The hearing that is gone is gone - no treatment will bring it back. But the news was the best I could hope for.
The neuro surgeon summed it up pretty good this morning - told me that the ENT dr. was definitely looking for this tumor when he ordered the MRI. He also said this usually hits people like a ton of bricks. Yup, he's got that right.
So, with the blessing of the doctor, it's full steam ahead. Pack, sign papers, and close the door behind us as we begin a new journey in two weeks.
Oh, and I finally found the place in WNY who makes the PERFECT pizza - and great wings too. I think we found that place the day I had my hearing test - at least something good happened that day. :) We took Laurie and Kasey there yesterday.
But the REALLY good thing that happened that day was that God sent me to an ENT doctor who was thorough by suspecting a tumor. And by making sure I followed up.
So, God is still here, blessing us. No surprise in THAT, is there? He is so good.
Blessings my friends.

With the sure and certain hope of Resurrection.


When my dad passed away in 1999, we were thankful that he had made all the pre-arrangements for himself and for mom before their health began to fail. They lived in Florida, and so, as my two sisters and I met that afternoon at the funeral home in Florida, there was very little we needed to worry about. The funeral home director had made all the arrangements to fly dad's remains to Buffalo for the viewing, the funeral, and the cremation. Dad even had his and mom's urns selected and purchased. And so, since I was the only daughter living in Buffalo, I brought his ashes home - and mom's also when she passed away in 2003. We knew that before we left for our new journey, the ashes would need to be interred in Dad’s family plot of a small cemetery about an hour from my home. Laurie hadn’t been able to get home when Dad died because she was in training, and she also did not return home when mom passed away since she and Stephen were on their honeymoon (I chose not to tell her until they were home), and also the war was looming and they were about to begin their deployment training. When I knew that we could inter Mom and Dad’s ashes while Laurie was home on leave, I asked her if she would like to be present. She said yes- it would be closure for her.
This morning, Ron and I, Laurie and Kasey took the ashes to the cemetery and had them interred. My sister asked me to be the one to do the brief service since she and our other sister both live out of state and couldn't be here to participate. So last night, I wrote a brief service, choosing Scripture and hymns I knew mom and dad would like.
I printed the service out last night on plain white paper, adding a graphic of a cross and a heart, and the words of John 3:16 to the front fold of the service; this morning – in the rain and cold wind of a WNY April morning, we stood before the urns and said our goodbyes. They are finally at rest. There’s an empty corner now on the concrete ledge that goes around our fireplace in the family room; yet with the sure and certain hope of resurrection, I said my earthly goodbyes this morning – knowing that at the time God has pre-ordained me to join them, I will embrace them again. To close the service, we sang The Common Doxology.
Indeed, Praise God from Whom all blessings flow.
Thank you for letting me share.
God bless you and may He bless our troops.

The girl in the Nike sweatshirt:

There's one thing better than a hug from your child - and that is:

watching as she hugs her own little boy. Life in it's perfect circle.

Dear Lord thank you for this long awaited reunion - please bless Laurie's and Kasey's time together. And also please bless a husband and daddy in the sand, knowing the two people he loves most in this world are together.

Let's get serious here!

Ok, this week is going to be a killer. Packing, cleaning, and physical therapy. Dishes, pots and pans, linens and all miscellaneous things joining us on our journey need to come out of their rightful places and get wrapped in newspaper and into boxes. Half of the two and a half car garage will be filled with boxes by week's end. This is a good feeling. Saturday, it took me a couple of hours to sort out all of Kasey's toys and condense them from two boxes into a large plastic tote with a picture of Lightening McQueen on it and a bright red cover (let know if you don't know who Lightening McQueen is :). Kasey, trying to help (but mostly saying, "I've been looking for this grandma" and then playing) was also asking, "Why is this taking so long and when can we color Easter eggs, grandma?"
Last night I was really tired - hips really bothering me from standing on the ceramic tile floor all day in the kitchen - so I was in bed by 9:30. It was a great day, but grandma was tired.
Today, no appointments or anything to draw me away from the fun - :) so I will get a lot done.
This is so that when Laurie comes to visit she won't feel like she has to pack stuff and can just spend time with Kasey.
The physical therapy for my back is going ok. I am finding all sorts of joints and muscles that I didn't even know I had but I guess this means it's working.
But I guess I'm not getting anything done sitting here blogging, right?
Better get moving. Literally.
God bless those held captive by the pirates in the standoff which just ended - and the Navy Seals who rescued them - thank God for their bravery.
May He bless all of our troops - those standing guard at home, and all those across the seas.

HE IS RISEN!!

It is Easter Sunday - the somber days of reflecting on the last supper, the betrayal, and Jesus' trial and death are over (all of which should never be forgotten), and CHRIST IS RISEN!

This morning's service of joy was as uplifting as always - the church filled with the scent of hyacinths, lilies, and tulips, the windows draped in white with butterflies fastened to the drapes to remind us of our new life in Christ. Pastor had changed the communion assistant schedule to include me because he asked me to serve this one last time with him before I leave in a couple of weeks. So, it was not only joyful this morning, but bittersweet. This was the 26th Easter Sunday since God called our family to the doors of this church. Year in year out, day in and day out, moment to moment, there has never been a time when Jesus hasn't been there. And because of this constant reassurance, He has been with me as well - no matter the path God has led me on.

And so again this morning, He was there in all His risen glory.

May He be with you today my friends - and each day to come. May the joy of the risen Christ also bless and be with the men and women who serve our nation at home and away. His peace is one which is everlasting - and the hope we have in Him a hope that endures forever. It matters not where we are, He goes with us.

HE IS RISEN. ALLELUIA!

It's not always easy.

We talked to Laurie last night. She got another good grade on an exam yesterday, but she said that two of her friends had not made the grades they needed to stay in the program. It's an extremely difficult program, and to make the "grade" so to speak, they are required to study, study, study. They have no "life" to speak of except studying, and I think it's discouraging sometimes when soldiers see their friends try so hard and not make it. Some people just don't do well on exams - studying for hours doesn't help, and hope isn't enough to get the grade they need. And so, although I heard discouragement in her voice last week, she isn't changing a thing. Her life is studying, PT, taking the dog for a walk or run, doing laundry (while studying of course). I know that she is tired, but she feels it's worth it. And so, Kasey and I will fill a box with happy things and send it to her for Easter. He made a wonderful dinosaur picture yesterday at preschool and he says his mommy likes dinosaurs so he will send it to her in our happy box.
Same with Stephen - he never sounds discouraged, but does sound tired. Our happy box will go to him tomorrow as well. Sometimes when he calls us at dinner time and he should be in bed, but says they just got back, it makes me wonder how the mission went. Know what I mean? So I bought him some extra special things yesterday and Kasey and I will make some cookies tonight and frost and decorate them. Stephen will know without a doubt who decorated them. :) And this is good. It isn't always easy to know what to say when they are tired or discouraged, but I just ask God to give me the words that will offer a little bit of sunshine or peace. I count on Him a LOT.

Things here at home are good - if busy is good then we are REALLY good. It's wonderful to have my early morning time with Kasey, to get him ready for school, comb his hair a bit because he needs another Army style haircut (we just did that about 3 weeks ago - it grows really fast).There's a lot to be said for busy-ness. It keeps me focused on the task at hand, and helps my heart be grateful for God's hand at work in my life. We don't always know where the road is going to take us- further away or closer to home - but we know He is always with us however long that road may be. And I am assured of His hand on my children as well. I pray they feel it.

God bless our troops - and all of us who wait.

Who would have thought?

Yesterday was my last day of work. It becomes official at beginning of business on Tuesday - I am retired. It's been quite a week for me...people stopping by my desk to say goodbye, or to say they thoroughly expect me to stop back sometime when we come "home" to visit Scott. And yesterday was an extremely emotional day - trying to get things done, a few problems here and there, little fires which needed extinguishing. And so, by the time I got to my wonderful party at 3 oclock, I thought I was doing well - tears had fallen during the day at various intervals but I had a handle on it.

Uh huh, sure I did.

It was a wonderful party and I did quite well until I opened my gifts - my co workers were so generous. And then it was time for me to speak. Saying good bye is just not something I am good at, and even though it came out ok, I woke up this morning thinking of all I could have added. There were three banners hanging on the wall with so many wonderful sentiments written on them, I didn't dare read them until I got home. This is also when I read some of the cards which were written by people I have come to love and respect - some of them in the background of this picture. Long story short - the smile on my face above is how I feel - truly. It was taken when I saw Ron and Kasey walk into the party and I thanked God that this is where my future lies - Ron has always been my life, but now we have another excellent adventure ahead of us. I look back on all the things God has brought us through, and I am so thankful, but I am sure that He has so much ahead of us as well.

When Ron and I got married nearly 40 years ago, Richard and Karen Carpenter had a mega hit - We've Only Just Begun.

Honey, here we go again - just beginning. But I have a feeling that every once in awhile, I just might be looking back - to savor the memory of 14 years working with friends in a job I loved.

God bless our troops.

Days with Kasey


Hi friends.

Sorry - it's been awhile since I've been here (or anywhere in the blogging world) but the days are pretty busy right now. This weekend, we are taking some time off to take Scott and Veronica, Luke and Kasey to the circus. Send in the clowns. (I don't like clowns).
Things are winding down here - I have exactly 5 more working days and then I will be an old(?) retired lady. This will be bittersweet for me - the other morning I went into my boss' office, shared a few tears, and said that this will likely be very hard for me to do. I think it's because I have enjoyed my job thoroughly - and have made some wonderful friends along the way.
And so, in just a Monday thru Friday work week, the days of phone calls and emails and processing and procedure writing will end and become - instead - days with Kasey. Selfishly, I feel they are passing too swiftly, and yet this mother's heart knows that the goal is for Laurie to get through school, Stephen to return from the sand, and all of them to be together. Mya, their dog (who gets to live with Laurie), will be glad when she doesn't have to spend her days cooped up in the bathroom. :)
I plan to write a story about all of this - about the coming days with Kasey...and all the ones that have passed since he came to live with us. Pictures and memories, reflections on being his grandma - and his guardian. The story will be written when Ron and Kasey and I are finally in our RV home somewhere across the country. I am thinking of nights spent in a cozy little living room, which is 3 steps away from the kitchen (excuse me, the galley- sorry Ron). There will be "weather" no doubt, but I'm just gonna hunker down and be retired-put a sweatshirt on if need be. That could be the toughest decision of the day - should it be my sweatshirt, or one of Ron's flannel shirts? Anyway, there will be pictures and some of Kasey's artwork, and a few odds and ends from Hobby Lobby :) and give it to Laurie and Stephen for Christmas. By then, Laurie will have completed her first phase of the program she is in and will hopefully be stationed back at home with Stephen. And then HER days will be with Kasey.
I also have something planned about Veronica - about the weekends she spent with us while Scott was living here during the first year of his separation from Tina.
It will be called, "Weekends with Papa" and I will give this to Scott when it is finished.
I hope that each of these books - Kasey's and Veronica's - will be something that will help them to remember the days we have spent together.
So the other day, as I cleaned out my personal things from my desk at work the other day (cleaning a little at a time each day), I found many things that could go into a personal scrapbook. One that I will enjoy putting together when leaving isn't quite so fresh in my mind, and the days of retirement are being enjoyed in an RV park somewhere in this great country of ours.
Stephen called the other night - they've been busy. :( Not what a mom wants to hear. But we are nearly 7 months into it all and on the down side. This is a blessing.
Thanks to all of you who have stopped in while I've been awol. While I was gone, I celebrated a birthday. My 62nd - lots of years behind me, more than there are ahead of me but God has a journey planned and I will follow it's path as far as it reaches.
Hard to believe that we'll be on the road in just about 5 or 6 weeks. But so will my computer.
God bless our troops and all of us who love them.