Saturday, May 30, 2009

The Faces of War



The other night, just as I was putting my laptop to sleep for the night, I noticed that I had a new email from Laurie...the subject line: Picture of Stephen!
Opening it, her words to Stephen's mom, to Ron, and to me were that she found a picture of Stephen on her FRG website. She was so thrilled to see it. It was an action picture - apparently taken during a mission. And while I shared my daughter's thankfulness at finding the one picture out of God only knows how many out there in cyberspace with a picture of her beloved soldier, it also made me cry. (you know how I am). I opened the picture and clicked on it to give me a zoom in, and sure enough, there he was. Now, my first words to that picture were, "Oh Stephen." And the next? Through tears, my prayer, Dear Lord, please bring our soldier home safely to us.
It brings the war too close to home...puts a personal face on it that I cherish...and yet, the loneliness that I feel for him and for Laurie and Kasey. Their loneliness for each other. He is but one soldier in more than one hundred thousand US troops now serving over in the sand. But he is OUR soldier, just as all the men and women over there belong to someone. They belong to many people - and all of them are ours. As individuals, and as a nation.
President Obama said on Memorial Day at Arlington National Cemetary, they are the very best our country has to give.
God bless them all - those faces across the sea, and those who serve at home.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Quiet moments.


I love those last few moments before Kasey gets tucked in to bed at night. The busy-ness of the day is left behind and the time for reading stories and saying prayers becomes a haven for this grandma. That's just it - after a long day for both of us, Kasey and I settle into who we really are - a boy and his grandma. It's our time to put behind us whatever stressors have made their unwelcome presence into our day. For me, those include this waiting for our closing to be done on our house, or the times I've had to raise my voice to a little boy who is being just that, a little boy. 'Eat your peas, Kasey.' 'No more chocolate milk until you have some bites of chicken, Kasey.'
'Please wash your hands, Kasey." Etc., etc., etc. (sigh).
For Kasey, it's putting the time outs he may have had at school behind him, or the words he may have said to grandma or grandpa which got him in trouble...all those moments which make a day upsetting to a 4 year old boy.
Tonight, the pain in my ribs was really bothering me but I wanted to read Kasey a story about Lightening McQueen and his ever present friend Mater the Tow Truck. When he saw that I was in a great deal of discomfort, he filled in the blanks...knows the book by heart...and recited it word for word just by memory and looking at the pictures. After the book, it's time to tell Kasey a story. He always tells me what the story should be about, and leaves the rest to grandma. :)
In those quiet moments, we also say Kasey's prayers - blessing everyone he can think of including 4 legged creatures he (we) love. Tonight we did a little detour from the prayers as he mentioned his doggie Mya and how he will see her when we visit Laurie in July. He can't wait - the love for her (and his mommy) brightening his little face with a beautiful smile.
We asked God to bless his daddy - and a side conversation with a quivering lip as he asked me why his daddy has to be in Iraq. My own lip quivered as I told him his daddy and all the other soldiers over there are brave and wonderful people who believe in making sure everyone is safe from the bad guys.
As we got near the end of his prayers, he was a little restless and I mentioned to him that when we talk to Jesus we should always pay attention to what we are saying. Which prompted a conversation about how Jesus died - "are those the same bad guys where daddy is grandma?"
(No, Kasey, but people are still not understanding why Jesus died which doesn't make them bad, just not understanding about Jesus).
In the end, we adjust his covers, turn the right nightlights on which allow him to read his book one last time for the day, and we say "Night Night, I love you" about 4 times until he is done asking last minute questions.
And I walk down the hallway....not feeling like a guardian at all.
Finally, I am just grandma. And I smile...just as I am smiling now.
God bless our troops and those who love them. Especially their children, who wait -and wonder just how long it will be before it isn't grandma who says their prayers with them, but their mommies and daddies.

Saturday, May 23, 2009











Because of the Brave




This is definitely a weekend when all military families reflect on the freedom our nation so cherishes - and even more, on the loved ones who keep us free. There's not a whole lot to it - plain and simple, we are free because of the brave.
We are ever so mindful of who to thank. Those who serve now, those who have served in the past, and especially those who have sacrificed everything - even their very lives - so that we may remain free.
It's a belief. A treasure we have been given; and something we can all too easily take for granted if we don't set our hearts in the right place.
What will you do this weekend to honor them? We will hopefully talk to Stephen - more importantly KASEY will talk to Stephen. We will also have our daily conversations with Laurie (and more importantly KASEY will talk to Laurie). And wherever we go, as we pass the flag dotted cemetaries, we will thank God for all who give today - all who gave so much in the past.
There is a certain pride that is in the hearts of Americans - not a boastful pride, but rather an appreciative pride. It allows us to stop and think - to be thankful for this land we live in. Not for the material things we have, but for the principle on which this nation was founded. For our freedom to worship, and speak, to be together in our ideals and opinions - or to differ in them.
I give you thanks, dear Lord, for our freedom. For these men and women who have given so much for so many years.
Since the beginning of time, there has been strife in this world. And therefore, warriors. Great differences in warriors, though, have made the struggles different as well. In America, we fight for Freedom - here on our soil, and wherever it needs to be defended.
In the hearts of our American warriors dwell committment, loyalty, courage, and if truth be told, fear. May Faith also dwell there as well. ALWAYS, may they know that God is with them.
God bless you and this land of the free we call home.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Connections



We are still waiting for a new closing date - a date that actually sticks this time - so this morning, I had just a few more things to go through before I could say I was satisfied with what I saved and what I couldn't keep. I have this notebook type album made by a good friend a long time ago. It's a red notebook with patriotic cloth covering it and the words "Military Moms" on it. Inside, many pages of postcards from military moms I have "met" over the years via this wonderful blessing called the internet. Some have remained good and close friends, some are easy to remember and make me smile in doing so, but are no longer part of our military moms website and we have lost touch; and others who have left the mms website are still good friends. A few years back, maybe 5 or 6 years ago, we had a group who decided to have a postcard exchange - we sent postcards from our home cities to each other and we gathered quite a nice collection - these are the postcards I found today in the notebook. Going through the pages of the book today and looking at the postcards from all over this great country, it made me smile.
My Two Star Banner is now packed away in a box and safely inside a uhaul, but it will be one of the first things I unpack when we have our new home and are sitting in a campground. I anticipate all the new friends who are out there - military parents those who see our Two Star banner and realize that they have found other military parents who can understand the sacrifices made, the fears they have, the pride.
I am grateful for the connections that make this roller coaster ride such a blessing - and if you are reading my words right now, I am grateful for YOU.
God bless our troops and those who love them.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009


Stars and Stripes Forever.



Well, since today seemed to be a pretty good day pain-wise, I thought it would be a good day to pack/sort/pitch the stuff in my linen closets. I only needed help with the top shelves - had nurse Ron pull those things down to my level for me. I sorted through the sheets and tablecloths and cloth napkins - so many were inherited from my mom and Ron's mom and Laurie had asked if I could give her some of them (gladly Laurie), so I went through them all. In doing so, I remembered the tables our moms used to set - with the ample and steaming bowls of mashed potatoes, and vegetables with cheese sauce or butter, perfect salads, and platters of meat - and full to the brim gravy boats sitting next to them. Dinner rolls - mmmm good - with REAL butter.
Anyway, it was a good project for today. A nice box of memories will go in the trailer with Laurie's name on it.
Of course it also meant going through the tons - ok, not tons, but LOTS - of dishtowels I have built up over the years. Some of the towels I've b0ught found their way into scrub buckets filled with Murphy's Oil Soap or Mr. Clean, and I found a few more that qualify for Mr. Murphy during today's task. But oh my gosh - I never realized how many patriotic towels I've bought, and been given, over the last 10 years or so since Laurie went into the military. Stars, stripes, patriotic hearts, lighthouses with flags offering a symbol of "light" as well. (Karen, I thought of you when I put them in the "save" pile, and figured you probably have some which are similar. Then there were the several navy blue and white checked towels with the patriotic hearts on them - Kim and Linda - I remember those with the mugs you gave me (the mugs are amongst those going with us - they made "the cut":). And the red and blue towels with white stars on them which Laurie bought in our favorite gift shop near one of her past duty stations where she and I did some of our best shopping with Ron's blessing - well, ok, maybe not with his blessing, but with his credit card. (Isn't that the same thing?).
And so, even though our patriotically themed wallpaper was stripped last month for the soon to be new owner of our home, the things that made this house our home - the touches that define who we are - will go with us. I am smiling here.
Stars and Stripes Forever? You bet.
God bless those who fight for those stars and stripes - and those of us who wave them proudly as we wait.

Friday, May 01, 2009

Ummm, Doc, can you help me please?


Hmmm. No, this isn't a repeat post. Last night, I had an early dinner (soup, sandwich PLAIN lemonade) with my friend and her little 8 month old daughter (she's gorgeous and friendly and smiley) and then stopped at Tim Horton's for some decaf coffee and some donut holes for Kasey.
When I got home, Kasey was talking to his mommy. Happy that I hadn't missed her call, I put my stuff down and went over to sit down. Kasey was just saying his goodbyes so I took the phone when he handed it to me and started talking to Laurie. Enter KLUTZ. I lost my balance as I was sitting down in the chair. The rest is kind of a blur...I fell, hitting my back on the cement ledge around the fireplace, bounced off the ledge and landed on the floor. Couldn't breathe, couldn't talk, couldn't holler for help or tell Laurie I was ok. I could hear Laurie saying - "hello, hello - are you there, mom?" And then I heard Kasey say to Ron, "what's the matter with Grandma? " Enter Sir Lancelot (Ron) who was asking me why I was on the floor, why I couldn't talk, what was the matter with me. One word answer: "FELL!" I couldn't tell him what happened - he just thought I fell. So, he hung up the phone - Laurie had hung up by then and two seconds later the phone rang and it was her - she thought she got disconnected. Ron told her that her mother fell and was trying to decide whether or not to get up off the floor.
So he said that I would talk to her today.
Enter pain. Shock is gone, pain is setting in. I got to the couch - Kasey runs to get his favorite blankie and says, "here grandma, this will make you cozy." (Don't you LOVE little kids? They offer so much comfort in so few words).
Long story short, I went to bed at 10 pm, woke up at 1:30 am and Ron helped me out to the recliner where I slept for four hours. This morning I felt better except for the spasms of pain in my rib cage. One visit to my favorite family doctor in the whole wide world, a visit to the xray place, and voila! 2 broken ribs, but my lung wasn't punctured.
Six weeks and I should be fine. But he gave me a couple of prescriptions for meds. He did say the packing, traveling, etc., wasn't going to be easy. Oh, well. When I think of how serious it could have been, it's really ok.
Today is Laurie's birthday - 29 for the first time. How did so many years go by? We called her first thing this morning so Kasey could say Happy Birthday to mommy. She had gotten her birthday box yesterday so that was the first thing she did when she got up. (this from the girl who said 'I don't need a THING.') I love sending birthday surprises, don't you? Even if they don't need anything - it's important to say to them: I NEED to tell you that I love you on your birthday and always.
Ron and Kasey should be home soon with Kasey's movies for the weekend. Bless his heart - and his grandpa's too. How blessed am I to have them here? No words to describe that blessing.
Have a good weekend everyone.
Message to self: try to stay upright. :)
God bless our troops.