Some things DO change.

We had a nice time yesterday at our house - a nice celebration! It was Scott's 33rd birthday - and it was cause for celebration. Last year at this time, he was in Washington state - I didn't know what to do that day. We spoke to him on the phone - had sent him a package which in itself was a small miracle since he had just moved out there less than 2 weeks prior and I really had to scramble to get it there - no way would I not have my oldest child thinking I didn't remember his birthday. We are kind of resigned to not being able to celebrate in the same room together when Laurie and Stephen have birthdays, (not that we ever have gotten used to it) but Scott is different. He has always just enjoyed birthdays at the house.
But last night, he was right there at the dinner table. We had a nice roast beef dinner, pineapple upside down cake that I had made Sunday night cause it's his favorite and I wasn't gonna buy it for him when I could just as easily make it the night before. And of course Ambrosia - it was a toss up between homemade applesauce and ambrosia...but I got all the fruit ready Sunday night and then just whipped the cream and folded the fruit in when I got home from work. It was a good dinner and his new "friend" was there for dinner too. Even Ron told her how nice it was to have her there for the celebration. And of course Binker was there to help blow out the candles.
So - what has changed? Well, I had asked Scott what he wanted for his birthday and he didn't know. HUH? Who was this man and what did he do with my son? No Play Station games? Does he have all the Metallica CDs?
No, this young man wanted things that he could use for when he gets an apartment - PRACTICAL things? Towels, potholders, dish towels. Oh maybe a teeshirt but mostly stuff for the apartment. And so, some things DO change.
The other thing that has changed is his attitude. When we were talking the other day, I said how different - and how much nicer - this birthday would be over last year. And he said, "you know, I have everything I need now. Starting with Veronica."
Thank you God.
Happy Birthday Scottie - Dad and I love you very much.

Blessings my friends. Thanks for stopping by.

It's almost that time.

This weekend I will go to the craft store and pay a visit to the ribbon department. We all know what color it will be, don't we?

Man oh man....it seemed like forever when the kids told us the deployment date months ago - and then of course it changed a few times (because the Army can do that), but now it's a for sure, so we are hunkering down for the long haul. It won't be long before Kasey arrives also, and I will save some of that yellow ribbon for him to tie around one of the front yard trees for his daddy. And we will wait together.

Last night, when I went to a local gift and party supply store to buy a couple of things for a party we had at work today, I saw some magnets at a counter near the register (Ron calls those conveniently placed displays "impulse alley"). I picked out two. One is pink and it says Happiness. The other is blue and it says FAITH. I took them to work today and I think placed them in good spots: the happiness one is above the "Army Strong" magnet; the FAITH one is next to my two star banner. That seems like a good place to keep that one. Next to my soldiers.

I had a weak moment the other day. As I was leaving work, I decided to stop in the rest room - my commute is a long one. I looked in the mirror as I washed my hands, and the circles under my eyes gave me away. Not always sleeping well these days, and all of a sudden I teared up and nearly started crying. Thankfully, no one came into the ladies room before I got out of there. Close call, eh?

Talked to Stephen's mom tonight - we are waaay too far away from each other in miles but we know that the phone bills in the next year will be a little bigger as we support each other. I am grateful we have each other - she loves Laurie so much, and she knows that we love Stephen more than words can say. They are soul mates -we both see that in our children.

And so, in the not too distant future, "that" post will greet you when you stop by. You know the one I mean, don't ya?

Meanwhile, I'm just gonna keep looking at my magnets.

Army Strong, Happiness, Faith, and my Two Star Banner.

Yeah, this is a good start, don't ya think?

God bless our troops.

An anniversary - of sorts. And I still believe.

One year ago last night, a very sad mom and dad took their son to the bus station and put him on a bus which would take him cross country and away from us all. He was in a marriage that was not working and wanted to get as far away as possible - which he accomplished.

Of course that mom and dad were Ron and I, and the son was Scott. I'll never forget the sight and the feeling in our hearts as we watched the bus pull away into the night. I only cried after it pulled away and was out of sight. It was nearly midnight and it was a quiet ride that Ron and I made home from Buffalo. I fell asleep pretty quickly after saying my prayers, but during the night I awoke several times, thinking, "I wonder where he is now."

And you no doubt have all had those mornings when you awake and think - just for an instant - "what is this weight on my heart?" and yet before you even open your eyes, you remember.

I've had several of those mornings - being a military mom and all - and the morning after Scott left was indeed one of them. But I got up and showered and dressed and put my makeup on (really needed the makeup that day), and went to work. Both of my supervisors said that they had been thinking of me the night before and I said that it had gone as well as it could have....and started the work that was on my desk. At lunchtime, my phone rang, and the number on the caller id was Scott's cell phone. He was fine, enjoying the trip, tired of sitting though. But I let that phone call set the pace for my feelings. After that I missed him, but somehow knew he would be ok.

Less than 3 weeks later, he would be on an airplane headed home...and has been here ever since.

And so, last night - unlike a year ago - my sleep was peaceful and uninterrupted. And this morning, as he sleeps upstairs, and the Binker watches Nogin, I am grateful for the year that has passed. He is looking for an apartment and will move out shortly.

As we look ahead we know that, for our family, there will be other nights - and mornings - like those we experienced a year ago.

A long time ago, when the kids were little and we were going through some tough times, Ron gave me a plaque with the serenity prayer on it. And I still believe that God is granting us all that we need - for every single day, but especially during those times when we are sending our son on his way to the other side of the country, or when a daughter leaves for basic training. or when our loved ones are off to war. I still believe in His goodness, and grace, and perfect will.

May He be ever close to you not just during those long nights and difficult mornings - but every single day.

God bless our troops.

We're out here!

Today at work I found out about a young girl who works in the office across the hallway - she's new to our organization, joining us this past spring. And until today, I did not know that she is a military sister...her brother is in the Army serving in Iraq - having gone there only 10 days after completing his AIT 5 months ago. Yesterday, his convoy was hit. His Staff SGT told him to sit in a humvee with two other men instead of where he usually sits. Moments later, their vehicle was hit. The SSGT was killed. The men on either side of her brother were both injured - not life threatening, but injured. And her brother was spared - not injured physically. But she said that, emotionally he is in very fragile condition. She was able to talk to him and her mom was able to talk to him as well - but he is very very upset.
So I told her that I am just across the hall if she needs to talk. After I talked to her and went back to my desk, it really hit me that soon Stephen will be over there. Please God, let me be strong at work especially and also when Kasey comes to live with us.
When I came home and told Ron about what happened at work, he said that it's so hard to know who is out there who is in the same boat. And when we find out about military families we need to make sure they know we are out here for them.
I've been gone for awhile - sorry about that. I was away this past weekend at a reunion of my dear friends who are - or were - military moms. We had a wonderful long weekend - tears when we hugged at the airport on Thursday and tears when we hugged good bye on Saturday night and Sunday. And in between times, much fun and laughter and tears.
Yup, we're out here alright. We just need to find each other so that we can help one another.
Thanks for being there...ummm, here.
God bless our troops - and those who love them.