Military friends.

A lot of what we experience in life can't be understood if we don't actually "walk in the shoes." We can sympathize and support, listen and pray - but we can't truly understand. For all of us who have - or have had - a loved one serving in the military, we know that it can't be truly understood except by another military family. You get upset during a war that your child or loved one is serving in, and you see someone nodding their heads as though they are understanding your anxiety. They try...they really try...but they don't. And sometimes we are told, "well that's their job." A week before Laurie left for basic training, Ron took Laurie canoeing - just a father/daughter outing - to a state park not too far away. It was a time for them to say the stuff dad needed to say to his daughter before she left. They discussed the fact that in the next five years, she quite possibly could be serving in a time of war. She knew that, and was willing to serve despite the dangers. When 9/11 happened - not just the twin towers but especially the Pentagon - we knew that time had come...no longer would Laurie be serving in a time of peace. The day after 9/11 I had an appointment at the eye dr. - an outspoken man with whom I didn't always agree, but I never argued my point with him. We had often discussed the fact that I have a daughter in the military so he knew that at times I was a little lonely for her - and worried sometimes too. What I was NOT prepared for on that day after 9/11 was his reaction to my statement, "this is not a good time to be a military mom." He answered very bluntly, "Why not? It's about time they earn their pay." I could not say a word - could not cry, or react in any way. My shock was too great.
Therefore, I allowed him to examine my eyes, tell me when I should return and let him make all the small talk he wanted to. (I wonder if he noticed that it was a one way conversation?). And I walked out of that office, never to return. I cried all the way to work - finally allowing myself to let his words sink in. And once I got to work and I told a friend what had happened, she did not understand.
She said, "Oh Susie - don't take it so personally." DON'T TAKE IT SO PERSONALLY??? Helloooo!
And it was then that I realized that Ron and I are different from many other parents. Our daughter is in the military and nobody understood how it felt.
A few weeks after that the local newspaper carried a story about a local woman who had started a website for military families. Called www.militarymoms.net, it offers support and encouragement for people who were walking in my shoes. Immediately (and still) I felt a connection to these other military families. Through the years since, so many of my friendships have been a gift of God through that website. We have gained many members - and lost a few as well. But in the loss of the memberships I have not lost friendships - our hearts are still connected because we share a common bond - we love a soldier (or veteran).
For all of you who are in a military family, please know that it is NOT just my daughter and son in law of whom I am proud and for whom I pray. I treasure our connection and wish that we could all meet someday just to discuss our soldiers and this roller coaster ride we've been asked us to share.
Until then, and even if that never happens, know that I value the kindred spirit that we have. And for all of you who read this and are not part of a military family - THANK YOU for your prayers for our loved ones.
We know that God is working - and will answer them all.
It's Sunday and Veronica is here while Tina enjoys some free time. The house is alive with her little voice and her laughter. The closet cleaning can wait for tomorrow.
God bless your week - thanks for stopping by.
Sue