An anniversary - of sorts. And I still believe.

One year ago last night, a very sad mom and dad took their son to the bus station and put him on a bus which would take him cross country and away from us all. He was in a marriage that was not working and wanted to get as far away as possible - which he accomplished.

Of course that mom and dad were Ron and I, and the son was Scott. I'll never forget the sight and the feeling in our hearts as we watched the bus pull away into the night. I only cried after it pulled away and was out of sight. It was nearly midnight and it was a quiet ride that Ron and I made home from Buffalo. I fell asleep pretty quickly after saying my prayers, but during the night I awoke several times, thinking, "I wonder where he is now."

And you no doubt have all had those mornings when you awake and think - just for an instant - "what is this weight on my heart?" and yet before you even open your eyes, you remember.

I've had several of those mornings - being a military mom and all - and the morning after Scott left was indeed one of them. But I got up and showered and dressed and put my makeup on (really needed the makeup that day), and went to work. Both of my supervisors said that they had been thinking of me the night before and I said that it had gone as well as it could have....and started the work that was on my desk. At lunchtime, my phone rang, and the number on the caller id was Scott's cell phone. He was fine, enjoying the trip, tired of sitting though. But I let that phone call set the pace for my feelings. After that I missed him, but somehow knew he would be ok.

Less than 3 weeks later, he would be on an airplane headed home...and has been here ever since.

And so, last night - unlike a year ago - my sleep was peaceful and uninterrupted. And this morning, as he sleeps upstairs, and the Binker watches Nogin, I am grateful for the year that has passed. He is looking for an apartment and will move out shortly.

As we look ahead we know that, for our family, there will be other nights - and mornings - like those we experienced a year ago.

A long time ago, when the kids were little and we were going through some tough times, Ron gave me a plaque with the serenity prayer on it. And I still believe that God is granting us all that we need - for every single day, but especially during those times when we are sending our son on his way to the other side of the country, or when a daughter leaves for basic training. or when our loved ones are off to war. I still believe in His goodness, and grace, and perfect will.

May He be ever close to you not just during those long nights and difficult mornings - but every single day.

God bless our troops.

We're out here!

Today at work I found out about a young girl who works in the office across the hallway - she's new to our organization, joining us this past spring. And until today, I did not know that she is a military sister...her brother is in the Army serving in Iraq - having gone there only 10 days after completing his AIT 5 months ago. Yesterday, his convoy was hit. His Staff SGT told him to sit in a humvee with two other men instead of where he usually sits. Moments later, their vehicle was hit. The SSGT was killed. The men on either side of her brother were both injured - not life threatening, but injured. And her brother was spared - not injured physically. But she said that, emotionally he is in very fragile condition. She was able to talk to him and her mom was able to talk to him as well - but he is very very upset.
So I told her that I am just across the hall if she needs to talk. After I talked to her and went back to my desk, it really hit me that soon Stephen will be over there. Please God, let me be strong at work especially and also when Kasey comes to live with us.
When I came home and told Ron about what happened at work, he said that it's so hard to know who is out there who is in the same boat. And when we find out about military families we need to make sure they know we are out here for them.
I've been gone for awhile - sorry about that. I was away this past weekend at a reunion of my dear friends who are - or were - military moms. We had a wonderful long weekend - tears when we hugged at the airport on Thursday and tears when we hugged good bye on Saturday night and Sunday. And in between times, much fun and laughter and tears.
Yup, we're out here alright. We just need to find each other so that we can help one another.
Thanks for being there...ummm, here.
God bless our troops - and those who love them.

She shoots...She SCORES!!

I love hockey - Buffalo Sabres hockey in particular - but I love it when our announcer, Rick Jeneret shouts (as only he can): "He shoots, he SCOOOORES."
It's my turn to say that...about Laurie. She got the unofficial (but for sure) word on Monday that the program she's worked so hard to be accepted into, well, accepted her. It will be posted soon but they have to shake things out, decide who goes when and details like that before they can officially notify her. She called me at work and told me and I, like the mother that I am, sat there and bawled like a baby. I am one for happy tears - I feel things like that very deeply - not because of pride so much (but you KNOW I am fiercely proud of all my children's accomplishments), but out of happiness to see my child get what she worked so long and hard to achieve. It was a long shot because so many are interested in the program and they accept so few. Because I am not only fiercely proud, but extremely careful in what I post about my soldiers, (it is, after all, the cyber world and anyone can read this) I am not going to say what it is that she will be training for. Soon enough I will spill it :).
When Laurie was promoted to SGT. , we were at the ceremony and I pinned her stripes on - they use sticky tape for those ceremonies - I was so nervous because the Colonel was there and I put it on upside down...comic relief in an otherwise very emotional moment. Poor Laurie - I started crying as soon as the NCOs came into the room with all the brass. She had her class A's on and LOOKED like a SGT...and like our daughter. Her eyes always smiling even when she is supposed to be dignified. She just can't lose the smile in her eyes. (I love that about her). THIS was our preemie baby girl?
Later, at dinner, we gave her our gift. I wanted to give her something that would commemorate the occasion without question...so that years later she could look at it and remember when we gave it to her. And so, I bought her a silver trinket box for her special jewelry - heart shaped and of course I had it engraved...it said simply:
To Laurie: An Army of One, with the date.
Like anything connected with the military, this won't be all fun and games. It will take all the strength we all have and a lot of special care of Kasey since he will be living with us for awhile while Laurie does her training. But God gave Laurie this opportunity and I am sure it will work. Once we sell the house and buy our RV, we'll travel to where Laurie will be and then Kasey can see her once or twice a week and realize that mommy is close by.
And so, my army of one just keeps the roller coaster going. Up and down, down and up...funny how you get used to something, isn't it?
Dear Laurie - you GO GIRL! We love you.
Thanks for letting me make tonight's post about Laurie...but somehow, I know you share our joy.
God bless our troops...and those of us who love them.

NOW we're getting someplace! (and drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweed).

Well, it's been a good day. Slept in a little bit, but not too late. Got up and made coffee and caught up on my emails a bit. Then the day began. Of course The Binker is here this weekend so that means my to do list is not always done in the order of importance because there's always...
"can I have some juice, Nana? I want berry juice please." Or "Is it lunch time Nana? I want baloney and pickles and some grapes and oranges..." (mandarin oranges - she loves them and Ron puts a black V on the top of the can with a Sharpie so she thinks they are made just for her).
So, today being my friend's birthday, I needed to make her cake. This is my friend who lives next door...we've been making birthday treats for each other for 28 years...since the first year we moved in....I took her over some cuppies that year (a family phrase for cupcakes from way back) and we've been exchanging ever since. Not always a cake...last year I made her my specialty..lemon chiffon pie with fresh whipped cream on top. This year it was my grandma's recipe: Bridge Surprise Cake...it's a wonderful recipe my grandma made up for the ladies in her bridge club on Thursday afternoons. It's a family recipe, about 80 years old...sorry, can't share. Teehee.
Anyway, I made a potato salad this morning too - we haven't had one all summer so I thought it would be good for the weekend since Ron is grilling out tonight and tomorrow. Once that went into the fridge, I went down in the basement to see where to start. We are doing the basement first and then "working up" through the rest of the house. I got lots into the garbage today - showed no mercy, so to speak....got rid of alot. Tomorrow will be the tough part...going through all the stuff I have saved over the years...and trying to see if it's all "necessary." Men think differently and so Ron isn't sure that I "need" to keep all these things. We'll see tomorrow. But we ARE getting someplace with the "stuff."
What's with the tumbleweed you may ask? Well, one year when we were on our way home from visiting the kids, Ron decided he needed to pick up some of that tumbleweed that you see drifting along the highway in the plains states. A cowboy movie fan from way back, he had to have some of it. And so, it's gone back and forth from our tool shed in the back of the garage, to the basement train room where the intention was to use it as trees and bushes along the highways of his model railroad. So I saw it lying on the floor of the train room and asked him what we were going to do with it (half expecting him to say we were going to keep it and take it with us in the RV). He said, with a sheepish grin, that he couldn't just throw it out, but wanted to "set it free" along the highway somewhere. Hmmm, brings an old cowboy song to mind...oh and by the way, I believe that we picked up the tumbleweed on the same trip that we listened to a tape of cowboy music. This year's trip we listened to Roy Orbison and Fleetwood Mack (thank God :).
Drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweed here...thanks for stopping in pard'ners.

God bless our troops.

Knowing when to give thanks.

The last week or so, since I got back to work, I have continued the daily tradition of sending Laurie an email at work. Her Army address and her Army Reserve address of course is a staple in both email accounts I have - Yahoo, and my work address. I need only type in the first two letters of her first name and it comes up first on my stored address lists. Her replies always give me reason to smile. Kasey's grumpy mornings, or their taking breakfast and coffee to Stephen because he has to leave the house by 5 and everyone else is still sleeping. These are days to be grateful for - days they can be together as a family before Stephen leaves. I am so thankful they have them.

I am normally a very positive person - glass half full; heck, overflowing most of the time. But lately - as I think more like a mom and about the upcoming deployment - the cup isn't so full. And it depletes the spirit. Not the Holy Spirit, for He is always with me, but the human spirit you could say.

Today, I am feeling more like my old self. It was a good day at work and although I did bring work home, it's a voluntary thing...whatever I get done will just be a bonus for my day. Know what I mean? And when you have a good day, you know that it's more important to give thanks for the blessings rather than brood on what you can't do anything about.

So I smile at the good things that are happening for our little family so far away. There will be time enough to fret when they are separated, but for now, I just thank our God for His keeping them together in these days before the sand.

Thank you Father...truly, thank You.

And thanks for stopping by, my friends.

God bless our troops - each of them a reason to give thanks.

Permission.


It never fails. I wear my two star pin, and people ask if I have a son serving. No, I say, I have a daughter and a son serving. Now of course people also don't always understand why I say a son, when Stephen is technically our son-in-law. And I say that I consider him our 2nd son, not our son-in-law, because that's how much we love him.
I went to a baby shower today for a high school friend of Laurie's. It was large - 70 people. Of course I sat at a table with people I had never met and first they asked me how I know the mom to be. I told them that Laurie and Melissa are good friends...eventually, when they asked me why Laurie wasn't there, I said because she and her husband are in the military. "I hope," the one lady said, "that they are stationed in the states and not over there." I told her that Stephen is about to deploy for the third time.
BANG! Every woman at the table started talking about President Bush, the war, the things wrong with this and that and how awful it is that the military have to serve in "these wars."
I sat with my fork in hand, finishing my dinner, and waited until they were all done, then continued drinking my coffee and eating my dessert. When the last one to speak said how proud she is of all those boys, I said "and women...and you can believe that I am proud of them all...and believe in their mission."
Does hearing a mom say she has a child(ren)in the military give someone permission to berate the President, the war, etc., etc.? Do they stop and think how the mom must feel...maybe she doesn't want to hear it again...for some moms they are all too aware of the cost and the fears.
And so I just said, gently, but to end the discussion, "and that's where faith and prayer and trust come into the picture. I just believe that Stephen will come home safely."
It's their right as an American to voice their opinion. And my right as an American military mom to voice my pride and my belief in what they are doing. I'm not a hawk...just a believer in God's perfect will. Human nature tells me I should be afraid of what this year will bring, but I trust that His Spirit will keep me on a path of Faith.

Praise Him who gives us that faith.

And God bless those who keep us free to practice our faith. I love them all.

Fine Things.


What is it that we all consider "fine things?" The best that money can buy? Or a soft cashmere sweater adorned by a set of cultured pearls? A home with everything you could possibly want or need?
For me, I am learning quickly the fine things in life. When we went out to see the kids, I took with me the keepsake box with some of the things I wanted to give Laurie - trinkets her grandma used to wear; and others which were not tangible, but were the stories that went with the things I took to Laurie. There was the sapphire and diamond engagement ring that Ron's mom got from her second husband...mom was so funny about that...saying that she wished she would have gotten a new ring from him instead of a "used" ring. Mom kind of lost the idea behind the heirloom that Eddie had slipped on her finger when he proposed. Laurie and I enjoyed a good chuckle over that, remembering how mom could be sometimes. And then there were the earrings that mom wore on our wedding day. I thought Laurie should have them. She proably won't wear them since they are a little outdated and they are clip ons, but it's something of grandma's and something from our wedding day that she can hold on to.
There were a few of my things in that keepsake box as well - my first birthstone ring for example. Aquamarine. Laurie can wear that...her fingers are so tiny.
So tonight, I was in the basement trying to hoe things out and get some things up for this weekend's garage sale. But I kept finding all these priceless things that I just put back in the cabinet down there.
What are fine things? A mug that says #1 Mom with the handle broken off and stains in it from the paints the kids used for their crafts. A few tears with that one - I'm hopeless that way. There was the plant holder - blue, with the words BABY BOY on it - this from the dish garden I received when I gave birth to Scott 33 years ago. I kept that too...yeah, more tears.
I guess what I am saying is that fine things are what you treasure. Things from the past - not that I want to go back to the past...but I never want to forget it either. SO many memories.
When I look Two Star Banner in our front window, I'm reminded of the little girl who first picked that #1 Mom mug out in a gift shop for Mother's day one year, and then used it for rinsing her brush in as she worked with water colors. I see a little boy's handmade cards and the awkward, funny shaped letters that spelled out "I love you Mom."
Fine things...they may not be lavish or expensive...but to me, they are priceless.
God bless our troops...they are treasures, and priceless.
Hugs,
Sue

From the mountains...to the prairies.

I guess there's no way I can put into words the wonder of all that we saw on this vacation. Hiking snowcapped mountain paths, and walking along the continental divide. Other times we saw the wheat and other crops growing row upon row, mile after mile. Green grass for as far as the eye could see and lakes and creeks running under bridges - bridges of steel and cement with cars whizzing by and trucks roaring past, sometimes with their air brakes whooshing; or small wooden bridges that you could only walk over. There were bridges made of split logs that we walked over to get to the other side of a stream - balancing so that we didn't slip off and get a "hot foot." Seeing elk and deer, old couples, young couples, teenagers just far enough enough ahead of their parents to make them feel independent (yet when they got to the gift shops they crowded around their parents to request money); and young children riding on their daddy's shoulders or in a stroller laden with diaper bag, juice boxes with those little straws sticking up, and mom and dad's water bottles.
There were marathon games of Rummikub with Laurie and Stephen - Kasey "helping" with the tiles as we concentrated on who was adding what numbers to the groupings on the table. Coffee and beer, water and juice, sometimes Jim Beam showed up...mostly just bottled water was the drink of choice. I think the best part of the whole week was watching my children and their son enjoy being a family. Laurie and Stephen are very disciplined with Kasey - but the love is over flowing and Kasey returns the adoration and love his parents have for him. I could watch them forever and not tire of this sight.
Saturday night, when I knew the hours were winding down and the time was drawing near to say goodnight, Ron and I called the kids and Kasey into the basement where their bedroom was and we said our thank yous for a wonderful week...and tried to express in words just how much we love them. I tried to tell Stephen everything I needed to tell him, but couldn't. The words couldn't get past the lump in my throat. Somehow, I think that he knows what I was trying to say. And so I just hugged him.
How is Kasey about his daddy's upcoming deployment? Well, one day when we were looking at RVs and speedboats, Kasey announced that he was going to buy his daddy a speedboat.
"But first," he said, "daddy has to go get the bad guys. Then when he comes home, I'll buy his boat." These words from the lips of a 3 year old boy.
From time to time I may mention this trip - it was peaceful and blessed. God was everywhere in the beauty of everything - and in the love shared by our family.
Back to work tomorrow - the mountains and the prairies will end up as wall paper on my computer as a backdrop for the one picture out of hundreds that best captures the memories of the week. No doubt it will be one of the kids with Kasey with their ever present smiles reflecting their love and happiness as a family.
Ron and I are so blessed...and we had all the time together on the road as well.
God bless America - she holds many wonders. Including the troops who protect her.
Dear God, bless them.

An End...and a Beginning.

Yesterday morning - before the sun was up - we hugged and kissed Laurie, Stephen, and Kasey and started the long drive home. Words cannot express what it meant to this mom's heart to leave them all, so although many of you can understand where I am at, you might have to read between the lines a little bit. It begins a new year of sorts as Stephen prepares for deployment.
I will begin by telling you that we had a wonderful time - and although I will fill you in on some of the best times (well really they all were the best but I will be kind to you and give you the highlights) tomorrow when the eyes are a little more rested and I have digested the fact that we are home again. Don't get me wrong - it's always a blessing to come home...it's just hard to leave the kids.
Last night as I tried to get to sleep in the motel room from he double L, (it was like something out of a Stephen King movie...details to follow in a day or two), I thought about the fact that so much will be happening in the coming year for our family. Good, bad, scary times. And yet, I know there will be blessings as well. I was a bit weary yet had a million thoughts racing through my head so sleep did not come easily. But after awhile - when the tears of missing the kids were shed quietly - I began to take stock. I ended the tossing and turning and fell asleep after thanking God for the blessings He had bestowed upon our family in the past 11 days. A mom needs to remember to give thanks instead of being needy...know what I mean?
This blog was two years old on Sunday - thanks for coming along with me and being such good friends for all of this time. I am hunkering down for the long haul - for a year of uncertainty, of prayer, and of trust in our Father. Because I know that He is holding us in His strong and loving hands. All of us.
Be blessed my friends - it's good to be home again with you.
God bless our troops and all of us who love them.

On being a Two Star Mom

I looked back at some of my old posts this weekend - since we are coming up on two years since Two Star Mom hit the blogging world. With all that has happened in our lives since Laurie first came home with the "I'm going to join the Army" announcement nearly 11 years ago, I was reminded yesterday during the garage sale that there are a lot of us out there. It's comforting to know that this sense of overwhelming pride/love/fear/OH MAN HERE WE GO AGAIN is felt by so many other parents. Today, as we wait for Laurie's call and hopefully to find out if she made the cut for the program she's been trying to get into, I am grateful for our very last garage sale customers yesterday. A dad - younger than Ron and I - but with the gray hair that so often comes with being a parent (a military parent specifically:), his son - serving in the Army now for 9 years and the son's wife who reminded me so much of Laurie - freckles, ponytail and all - now a veteran after serving in the Army as well. The dad said, "we saw your Army stickers and decided to stop." It wasn't difficult at all to get into a conversation - about Pride/love/fear and OH MAN HERE WE GO AGAIN. :)

The son and his wife served in Iraq at the same time - together in the same city but not in the same unit. So they were able to see each other, and their parents feared for them both at the same time (a familiar story to this mom's heart except that Laurie and Stephen didn't see or hear from each other for 5 months during the time they were over there together).

And so, we spoke to these two young people as we speak to all soldiers. Thankful, with respect and with honor. They are after all, the best of the best our nation has. And when they left, although they hadn't purchased anything, we were richer by far in having met them.

And THIS two star mom is grateful for each new day that I get to BE a two star mom. It's not easy, but it's easier to be the mom rather than live the life my children lead. And it's a strengthener of faith and trust. I saw a lady this morning at church - I posted about her grandson several months back - a Marine who came back from Iraq and is now going to Afghanistan amidst rumors in the news that Iraq is safer than Afghanistan. It's not easy-but we step out in Faith and with Trust in our Triune God. Our Father the Creator who restores the faith we need to get by each day. His Son Jesus - our reason for the trust we have in God's perfect will, and the Holy Spirit - who guides us each and every day in the way we should go.

Stepping out in faith isn't always easy - but we aren't doing it alone. We have our family and friends, and the military family of friends who walk in our shoes, yet are each in a unique situation.

I try to always remember that my support system sometimes need me as THEIR support system too in other matters of life that are important to them.

And I lean on my Friend who is always with me. With US - how does He manage all that?

I don't know...but I don't question it. This two star mom is just grateful - for all of you, a gift from the Father.

Sometimes, when it seems to be too much, our Father lets me crawl onto His lap to rest. It's a reassurance that all is well. And truly, it is, isn't it?

God bless you all.

Two Star Mom

Make me an offer!

Saturday in Western NY - garage sales abound! Including our garage. Yesterday was the beginning of a 3 day sale - was supposed to be a block sale but it doesn't look like too many are participating. That's a good thing for us - we did very well yesterday - $130 bucks - and only one person tried to get something cheaper and Ron held his ground. It was a chainsaw and all of the accessories - runs great, asking price $35 which even the guy said was a good price...then proceeded to ask Ron if he would take $30 and Ron said no. The guy bought it for asking price. Geesh. We've been open for an hour this morning and have made nearly $100. This is good - tanks of gas money for our trip next week. We must have good prices on the stuff because they are buying the stuff without questions (except for that one guy). If someone wants to buy two thingss, Ron usually gives them a combined price. It's worth it if we can get rid of the stuff and not have to throw it out.

Probably one of the most popular items were the two HUGE bags of stuffed animals which had a sign on them: FREE TO A GOOD HOME!! The last time Laurie, Stephen and Kasey were here we asked Laurie to pick the ones she wanted to save or give to Kasey and then we sent them out in a box because it was Christmas and their luggage was full enough. She then gave us her blessing to do whatever we needed to do to make sure they weren't thrown out, making sure that they would go to kids who wanted them. Uh, Tina allowed Veronica to take a couple of them but the rest went out to the garage sale. Two kids were here, took one and then came back for more. (one apiece please) Then a family with six kids came and wanted more than one apiece. One little kid was upset that he couldn't have more than one so his big sister said to him in a loud whisper, "that's ok, I'll take one too and then give it to you when we leave." Funny. Anyway, they are nearly gone and I am glad because at least we didn't throw them out. Lots of memories in those animals. ("Be strong, Susan, be strong" this little voice is telling me).

So, last night my foot and ankle were like a balloon - today is much better so I will be busy today doing things to get ready for our trip. I am so thankful to have this air cast on because it doesn't hinder me a bit. Tomorrow I am going to try to drive - just to church which is only a few minutes away. I won't try driving to work yet - stop and go traffic for 28 miles would not be good for the ankle.

A week from now we will be with the kids and Kasey. I can't wait - it will be a wonderful 10 days-even our road trip will be fun. They always are.

Prayers for our troops - it's been a sad week in the sand with many casualties. May God bring those soldiers families peace in their hearts. And may they know that their sacrifice will never be forgotten.

God bless our Troops - and those of us who love them.

May He also bless you...thanks for stopping by.

The doc says....

Hi everyone.

Thank you for your comments and prayers. I went to the orthopedist yesterday and he said that if I was going to do this, I did it the right way. No torn tendons, and when I sprained the ankle, in the process of the sprain, the tendon pulled a bone chip off my ankle bone but the tendon did not actually tear and the bone did not shatter. So I am so thankful. I have to wear an air cast for six weeks and of course ice and elevate it but I can make the road trip next week. I feel so blessed. I am back at work today - elevating the ankle on the same box that I used to elevate my leg when I broke my kneecap last year. At least I am consistent. :) I just had to move it under my desk from the left side to the right.
Prayers for our troops - those in the Middle East and those who serve everywhere else, including those stationed here at home. God bless them all with courage and faith and peace. And those of us who love them.
Hugs to you all,
Sue

ELEVATE, ELEVATE, ELEVATE!!


Today I was coming down the stairs with Veronica, not paying attention to what I was doing and stepped off the last step - suddenly realizing as I crashed to the floor that it wasn't the last step.
I fell with all my weight on my right foot and ankle, heard a crack as I went down. And there you have it - one easy lesson in how NOT to descend stairs. We took Veronica home early and went to the urgent care center and the xrays confirmed a chip in my ankle bone. So here I sit with a soft cast on my foot and ankle and looking forward (NOT) to seeing my primary care dr. in the morning and maybe an orthopedist. Lots of ibuprofen, ice, and elevate, elevate, elevate.
I can walk with a cane and as I told the dr. today this will NOT keep us from going to see the kids next week. Thank goodness I have 10 days to rest it. It could have been a whole lot worse.
So if you don't see me around for a few days, this would be why. The nurse in attendance is pretty strict so I have to do what he says. :)
God bless our troops and those who love them.

Long may she wave!

Today is flag day - a day that Americans sometimes forget in the busy-ness of life. But indeed, she flies regardless of whether we remember June 14th is the day to honor her.

We took Veronica to Chuck E Cheese's today and I noticed something. There were a LOT of people - younger people in their 20's and 30's who had shirts on that had a flag on it. Some shirts faded - tried and true to their owners like the picture that was on it - but flags just the same. It felt good to see it. I wore my red shirt with America written across it in white, and my blue jeans and white shirtjac. You better believe I'd remember today.

It's also the 233rd birthday of the US Army. Happy Birthday to the best army in the world - and to the soldiers who are the best of the best. And this two star mom is grateful for everyone who stands up to volunteer to defend our nation. It's truly an Army of one - and each and every soldier is the Army.

Laurie and Kasey arrived where Stephen is today - they will have several weeks together before Stephen is deployed. He is a proud soldier - proud of the flag and the country he defends. I am trying to think of something I can take to him when we go out there in a couple of weeks. I don't know what I can give him to let him know how proud we are and how deeply we love him. God will help me on that - I am trusting in that.

Also, on June 14th, I wish my dear friend Arkansas Sue a Happy Birthday. There is a group of us military moms who call her that because her name is Sue (nice name) and she lives in, well, Arkansas. There's a funny story of how she got her name, the same story that made me end up as Suelaurie amongst our closeknit group of friends. We called each other that once, and it has stuck for more than 6 years.

God Bless America and the troops who keep her free.

A good man.


Today, on the way home from work, as we were stopped at a traffic signal on campus, the talk radio host suddenly made a sad and shocking announcement that had just come in from CBS: Tim Russert had passed away suddenly this afternoon.
Tim was not just an average reporter - wasn't out to get a story at any cost as some of the reporters we see on tv. He was a kind man, anxious to give the American public a good and accurate view of what is going on in our nation - and across the world. But tough as he was on those he interviewed, there was compassion and empathy in this man's heart.
And of course, his Buffalo roots went deep - he was so proud of our city and of the difficulties our city has weathered; proud of every trip Buffalo Bills unsuccessfully made to the Super Bowl and of the Sabres Stanley Cup losses, but mostly he was proud of his Buffalo heritage because it represented a toughness that doesn't exist everywhere. He was proud of his relationship with his dad and his son, and of the strength of the people who live in the city he grew up in.
I could go on and on - but all the networks and news channels will do the same so I will just say thank you to Tim for the honesty and goodness he portrayed in all of his reporting. We will miss him here in the Buffalo area.
He was a good man.

Borning Cry

Today is Veronica's birthday and she is 4 years old. I saw her come into this world and was the fourth person to hold her - after Tina, Scott, and the nurse. The beauty of God's love all wrapped up in a tiny little baby girl. She was blue because the cord was around her neck, but she pinked up really quick and cried with vigor - as if to say, "ok, what am I doing in this cold room? I WAS nice and warm just a few minutes ago!"

Scott and I had been with Tina all during the night before - the room WAS cold, and as Tina slept peacefully with the intravenous drip quietly going to work to induce her labor, Scott and I were together, but alone with our thoughts - since talking would have woken Tina up. They had allowed me to say a prayer with them before Tina slept, and I was thankful for that privilege.

And so, finally, after a full day of labor, Veronica (we now call her the Binker for some unknown reason) was born shortly after 6 pm. Funny but usually you can't tell who a baby looks like when they are first born. But Veronica was just a dark haired Scott - it was like going back 30 years as I remembered the day he was born - and my red headed boy who had REALLY not wanted to arrive. After 10 full months, he finally did.

Sorry, I digress.

There is a song we sing in church during baptisms, and oddly enough, during funerals as well. It's called Borning Cry, written by John Ylvisaker, and it is God speaking to us about how He is there when we are born...and watches our lives unfold. It goes from birth, to youth, speaks of middle age, and finally, how He is with us when we are old. I cry buckets when we sing this song and I mean buckets. It just tells such a story.

And so today, as He has been since she was conceived, the Father is watching our Binker. Our Princess, as she so often proclaims herself. :) He has a lot of watching to do now - no doubt his eyes are always busy as she runs here and there in play. Scott and Tina are taking her bowling tonight and on Saturday we will have a little party for her.

Put Borning Cry into your browser sometime - read the words and remember them. They are not just words to sing on special occasions, but all of our lives.

Happy Birthday Binker - we love you!

God bless our troops and those who love them.

Taking Flight.

We have a room air conditioner in our family room. It sits in the top window, cools things down nicely on those really hot, muggy days and nights(like tonight) when the breeze coming through the sliding glass door to our deck and the open windows do not provide the cooling cross ventilation that can be so refreshing on a summer day, or night.

Each year, a mama bird builds herself a nest on top of that air conditioner, just outside the window. It clings there during the late winter storms of March, the heavy rains of April, the uncertain weather that May can bring. While the air conditioner wears it's winter cover on the inside of the house, on the outside there is a mama robin sitting on that nest. She holds on for dear life - not just her own, but that of her yet unborn babies. She leaves only once or twice a day for food, or waits for the daddy bird to bring it to her.

When God - in His remarkable compassion and perfect timing - finally allows the patience of the mother bird to be rewarded and those tiny blue eggs give way to fuzzy little creatures, we begin a new watch of the nest. The view is different.

Ron, from his study window and while he surfs online for places we will be taking our RV to, can see the amazing picture change each day as he sees those baby birds peaking their tiny little beaks above the shelter of the nest. And soon, he hears their little peeps as they squawk at their mom for food.

Then, before we realize it, it's time for them to take flight; they leave the nest for moments at a time with their mom and dad - learning to fly - until, finally, they are gone. Sometimes, as it happened this year, one stubborn little bird waits awhile - not quite ready to take flight. And Ron watches each day as the "holdout" sits in the nest, or perches on top of the air conditioner - which this year just so happened to need repairs. Ron couldn't fix it of course because the nest was still there, and couldn't move the nest in case the little bird took a long day trip but needed to come back to it's shelter. As if on cue, with this weekend’s warm weather moving in, we found the bird gone this week, and it was safe to remove the nest it from it's perch. Funny feeling - hearing the air conditioner that now hums behind me, it means that it's gone...and next year, if everything goes as planned, we will probably not see that rite of spring.

And so it is with us all and with our children. We take flight when we know that it's time. Whether it's leaving a home we've lived in for half our lives, or watching a child leave to make their way in the world. Scary thought, no matter who you are - the parent, or the child.

As Scott goes apartment hunting, I think of the fact that this will be the second time he has left "the nest." The first time was 9 years ago - he was so excited about finally having his own place. All the things that have occurred in those 9 years, his marriage, a child born, a separation...and coming back to the nest for awhile. He knew that he could; that he was welcome...and that we would be here too, so it wouldn't be a strange place to come home to. When he leaves again, it will be just as painful on this mom's heart as the first (and yet I want it to be just as exciting for him as the first time he left). But isn't that what we do? We let them go...no matter how many times they need to return, we need to let them go again.

Taking flight - it's not easy. For our family, as so many others, Stephen is leaving the nest…taking flight in a different way when he travels to the sands of the Middle East. And when Laurie and Kasey walk away from the airfield when his bus pulls away – so many of you know the scene – they will be taking their own journey. Dear God, protect them all while they are apart. (a prayer I say each day for others as well).

We have a lot of flights ahead of us as I retire within the year, as we sell our home, and as we move to where Laurie and Stephen and Kasey are. Until then, well, we’ll be sitting in or near the nest – until God decides that it’s our time to leave the nest and just like that little bird, without fanfare.
After all, He is with us.
No, it's not easy....but this taking flight is the cycle of life. Just like those baby birds, we don't take flight until we (they) can fly on our/their own. (Dear God - please let my children always need me).

God bless our troops and all of us who love them.

Love Hurts



I said to Ron tonight on our way home from dinner, "Do you think I'm ever going to get over the fact that Scott and Tina split up?" It's almost a year now, and last night when Tina brought Veronica over, Scott and Tina were talking like old friends. About what you may ask? About Scott trying to find an apartment and Tina telling him where the good ones are-and the bad ones too. If it didn't hurt so much it would be almost funny. Almost.
The fact is, they are both getting on with their lives. Scott is dating a very nice girl, and I think Tina is dating someone as well. I thought I was over the mourning stage, but I guess I'm not.
Will I ever be? I am thankful that they are on good terms - as Ron reminded me tonight, they have a long time to go together as Veronica's parents.
And then there are Stephen and Laurie. Separated not by choice but by the Army's plan for them. They love each other so much - and they are such good parents to Kasey. Tonight, Laurie is back home with Kasey they spent the week with Stephen. In a few weeks, Laurie and Kasey will go back and stay with Stephen until he deploys. This is when we will visit them.
Love hurts. It hurts when you see your children separate, whether it's a marriage that doesn't work out; or when they are separated by war. Either way, it's rough on hearts. Probably no rougher on mine than on theirs, but when a mom's heart hurts, it feels like the hurt is multiplied by three - her kids hearts and her own. Know what I mean?
So this gives me a lot to pray about - and reconcile with. Eventually that will happen.
Until then, well, love hurts.
Big time.
Thank you Lord for helping me t0 remember that your love is far greater than the hurt.

Shouldn't I be in bed by now?


It's midnight and I will be groping for a noisy alarm clock at 0520...I think I should have been in bed awhile ago. Brought some work home tonight and got it all done...this will make my day a lot better tomorrow at work.
Today was not what you would call a good day - one of those Murphy's law kind of days...and yes, what can actually did (go wrong). Good thing it's the end of the week, eh?
This weekend is going to be one of those busy, non stop kind of weekends but I should get a lot done. Scott is taking Veronica out for the day on Saturday so Ron and I hope to get a LOT of stuff out of the basement...we are showing no mercy. If it doesn't look garage sale worthy, then it gets pitched. Huge garage sale at the end of the month - our whole block is doing it. This makes it a bit more worthwhile - more people should drop in.
Ron has to pack up my Noritake china that he got in Japan when he was in the Navy. It was his mom's but I inherited it and I sure can't carry that in an RV all around the country now, can I? So when we take our road trip to see the kids, we will also take the china...it's Laurie's now.
That would make her grandma happy.
This retirement/selling the house is starting to sink in now. Hope we are able to sell it quickly so I can actually retire when we plan it. Of course I am not betting my life on it 'cause we all know that the best laid plans of mice and men...are just that. Plans. Not necessarily the will of our Father. Can't argue with the perfection of His plan, you know?
Well, tomorrow is Friday - TG. The week was one day shorter but it didn't feel shorter - know what I mean?
Thanks for stopping by...
God bless your Friday...and may He be with all of our troops.
Sue

I almost lost me tonight. :)

Hi. Tonight has been a disaster. WAAAAY too much time on my hands - decided I should REALLY get down to the nitty gritty and post some of your links. Ah, not easy. First of all, since I have been using the old format, I needed to update the Template. Bad idea. And as I looked at the new template - which I hadn't noticed that it didn't allow my profile to show or a link list or anything (HA!! That's if I ever get that mastered). And so I sat here and said, there's a hole in my bucket dear Liza, dear Liza...remember that song? So I quickly got this one back and so I am back to square one - a little bit wiser but in familiar territory. Phew! Scary!
It will all fall in place one of these days.
Won't lose any sleep tonight, that's for sure. Last night was one of those nights when I was up late and still couldn't sleep. Plenty to think about these days (and nights).
And during that time, when I am staring at the ceiling in the pitch dark, your loved ones who serve - and mine - are in my thoughts and prayers.
Be blessed - and may you feel His peace.
Sue

Back to work...with memories.

Tomorrow takes me back to my desk - looking for adventure, you might say. There's always fun at work this time of year - we're so busy that we find a lot of laughter in the little things that lighten the day. Are we punchy? Nope, not at all. Do we enjoy our time there? It depends on who you ask - I for one say YES!
It's been quite a weekend. Friday I ended my work day by attending a wake for the stepdad of one of a friend and co-worker. Veronica was all wound up on Friday night but a good night's sleep for all of us helped immensely. Saturday, instead of the park, we went to the playground and she loved every minute. We came home and grilled some steaks and then went to the dairy just down the road for ice cream. I learned that when you want just a small chocolate/vanilla twist cone, you ORDER a small chocolate/vanilla twist. NOT a medium. Veronica fell asleep before I could get her in the bathtub and so yesterday - much to her surprise and delight - she had a "morning bath." (a morning bath, Nana???). When I came home after church, it was definitely a park kind of day - so we took Veronica to the park. There would be something for everyone...
At the gates of the park, and throughout the park itself, there were small flags lining the roads. Veronica enjoyed the swings and the slides, but her Papa and Nana were thankful to see the flags and to appreciate just how much time it must have taken to line the many miles of road with these flags. As we were on our way through, we stopped at a Veteran's memorial walk...and took the journey that led from a small parking lot to the shores of a placid man made lake. Along the way were benches honoring all the branches of the Armed Services. Near water's edge, at the end of the walk, the sidewalk ended with a circle of copper colored tiles surrounding a monument. And on the tiles, were the names of many WNY natives who died for the cause of freedom - some of the tiles had the names of father and son who had died in two different wars, or a grandfather and grandson. And on another tile, was the name of a young man I knew in high school who died in VietNam. I will never forget the moment in 1967 when I read of his death in the Buffalo News. And so, when I saw Charlie's name, the tears that had been brimming in my eyes, finally flowed. And I prayed.
Adding to the weekend is that God brought me a new friend. Somehow, in this huge place that we call cyber space, I found her blog. She is Anna, and can be found by clicking on her name in the comments from Saturday's post. When I get to be intelligent enough on this blogging thing, you'll see her in my link list - which will basically be a copy and paste list from my favorites. I call them Connections because that's what they do...they connect me to the awesome people who are out there. That would be all of you.
Blessings for your week my friends...God bless our troops.

Remembrance.

It's such a beautiful day today - the sun is shining, leaves are still (as in quiet) on the trees, and Lily is lying on the back deck in her sunbeam. I think it's a good day to pack up a few things and head to the park with Ron, Scott, and Veronica. There are swings to be swung, slides to be, well, slid :), and teeter tauters to balance. A quick stop at the grocery store to pick up some impulse items, (chips, cookies, etc.) and some good things like fresh fruit, and we will be on our way.

But Memorial Day Weekend is not just an extra day off from work. As the war(s) carry on, and the news reports remain grim (because the networks would rather report the bad than the good), we realize more than ever the significance of this weekend....remembering those who have fallen defending our flag, and our freedom, and the liberty of others as well. On Monday morning our flag will fly at half staff and I will stop cleaning, writing, doing whatever I am doing at 11 and pray with the nation. For 'permanent peace,' as our President phrased it in his Memorial Day proclamation yesterday. And for those who strive to accomplish that 365/24/7 because they have been called by conscience , patriotism, or by God to serve and to sacrifice.

Ron and I will be leaving in a few weeks on our road trip to see the kids. We do love our road trips no matter how long they are, and I liken them to rainbows because at the end, we find our pot of gold. Our soldiers and their little soldier. This will not be an easy trip as it will be our final family time with Laurie, Stephen and Kasey before Stephen deploys. His date was moved up a couple of months and so the roller coaster starts that long climb a lot earlier than we expected. As so many of us know, this is what life is about for the families who love those who serve.

I ask that we all take some time this weekend - as most of us do enjoy that extra day off - to remember those who have fallen and those who are still serving. At home in this great nation, and in places far away.

May God bless them all, and may He bring peace to the hearts of those who love them.

Sue

Busy-ness

Today, I went to the funeral of an old friend...a friend with whom I've been out of touch with for awhile because of pure and simple busy-ness. I thought of her so often...wrote her an occasional note and went past her home many times, thinking, "I really need to stop and see Sharon." Except she didn't like people to just stop in because she was embarrassed about the inside of her home. She spent 24/7 taking care of her daughter who had severe Downs syndrome and it left her little time to take care of the house. Outside, though, every flower imaginable grew in her garden - to pass her home was like passing a rainbow. It's beautiful - just like Sharon. The flowers added to today's post is a remembrance of her love for all things beautiful.

For Christmas, Scott gave me a Purpose Driven Life calendar - so that I can count down the days to my retirement. Often, I find myself trying to catch up to this calendar's words of advice for a week at a time because I don't always read them.

On Tuesday, I went past Sharon's house on the way home from work. I had the car that day and needed to stop at the craft store so that I could finish up a Teddy Bear poster I am making for my friend's daughter. Her house was dark, but I made up my mind that I would call her this weekend. Instead, as we were eating dinner on Thursday night, Ron told me that a friend from church had called earlier in the day and said that Sharon had died. I can't describe how I felt.

As I cleaned my desk here at home this afternoon, sorting through this and that, I realized that I hadn't read or torn the pages off my calendar in awhile.

This is what it says on the page I look at now...ironically from Tuesday, the day I had driven past Sharon's house.

It says, 'Busyness is a great enemy of relationships. We become preoccupied with making a living, doing our work, paying bills and accomplishing goals as if these tasks are the point of life. They are not. The point of life is learning to love-God and people. Life minus love equals zero.'

In church this morning, singing the hymns Sharon's family had chosen for her service, I realized -even before I read them - the meaning of Tuesday's words of wisdom on my calendar. I didn't need to read them to know that the enemy of busyness has stolen a great deal.

I have a lot of catching up to do - so that nothing else is lost.

Blessings,

Sue

Happy Mother's Day


Whether you are a mom, or a daughter who is also a mom, or a grandma...today is "our" day.
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!! And if you are a single dad, or a stay at home dad, or a man whose wife is deployed because she is a soldier, Happy Mother's Day to you also because you often are BOTH mom and dad to your children.
What are your plans for the day? A bbq with all the kids and grandkids? A quiet day at home working on a scrapbook? Dinner out with all of your family? Whatever your plans are, know that you are appreciated and loved.
Yesterday a big brown truck pulled up to our driveway and I figured it was some sort of parts that Ron might have ordered - he's always fixing things you know (even if they aren't broken).
But lo and behold, as I continued to clean my closet, Ron came in the door hollering my name and saying that I had a package. When we were in FL a few weeks ago, I had commented on the gardenias that were all around my sister's home. And so, opening the package revealed a gift from Laurie, Stephen and Kasey - a gardenia plant. And so I cried - what else would I do? :)
Laurie remembered that I loved gardenias. That touched me so deeply.
Ron says that I have a surprise coming today - I'm not one who needs special treatment on any holiday (but Laurie, Stephen and Kasey sure racked up a lot of points with that gardenia : ). So I'm not sure what that means - dinner out? That would be a treat but not likely on Mother's Day since restaurants are so crowded and we usually avoid them like the plague on holidays. :)
Whatever it is, just having a day to enjoy with Ron and Scott will be nice.
And so I say, Happy Mother's Day to all my friends...may you be blessed.
Sue

We've only just begun.

Do you remember that song by the Carpenters? 'White lace and promises - a kiss for luck and we're on our way.'
Well, sometimes that phrase (we've only just begun) can be used for other things besides the white lace and promises.
For us, we began today. Stephen left for his new unit and for the training that he will need for the sand. He's been out of his old MOS for awhile now and will need to make sure that he becomes reacquainted with the things that once fit like a comfortable pair of old slippers.
And so, we will walk this uncertain path together, my friends. He hasn't even left the states yet, and already I am weepy. Maybe it's because this is Mother's day weekend. Or maybe it's just that I am thinking about my soldiers and their little boy sleeping apart for a long, long time to come. Laurie and Kasey will visit him a few times before he leaves for the sand - thank God for 4 day passes and holiday weekends. And he will have a 2 week block leave sometime in the summer - they will be coming home to visit. We are not unique - this is happening to many families these days - and I feel their pain. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, let alone my friends.
Thanks for your company. My friend Michelle mentioned in her blog A Cup of Tea With Friends
the other day that family can be those other than your relatives. A lot of you out there I have never met, others I have known and loved for a long time. And you are all family.
Whoever you are - WHEREVER you are, well, I thank you so much for coming along on this journey. I might just quote a line or two of Scripture that seems appropriate from time to time, if that's ok.
And so tonight, I will close with one of my favorite passages from Hebrews 11:1 - the faith chapter. "Now faith is the substance of all things hoped for; the evidence of things unseen."
Things unseen are what shapes and strengthens us - trust and faith in an unseen God is what I will count on...
May He bless you.
Sue

It's been decided.

Well, as it turns out, the Army was very quick in their decision. Stephen will be deployed as planned. At first he was hoping that he could stay with Kasey if Laurie makes the cut for the program she has been trying so hard to get into. He wasn't trying to get out of his deployment since he would have deployed at a later date. But the army says no. Pure and simple. No.
So now, we will proceed with Plan A as originally decided with a slight change in Laurie's schedule if she makes the program. She will report at a later date so that she can stay with Kasey as long as possible while Stephen is away, and then we will have him the remainder of the time.
I am so proud of Stephen's attempt since it could be misconstrued by some as an attempt to get out of his deployment. He was putting his family first. They are always willing to support one another in their military careers - no matter what it takes.
I will probably be here day and night during his deployment - hope you don't get tired of seeing me.
He has some training to do and we will visit him one more time before he leaves. And then, once again, the yellow ribbons go up on the trees in front of our home and the special yellow ribbon pin with the Army star attached as a charm will go on, and be worn each and every day until he comes safely home. The all too familiar routine will begin again.
For those who are experiencing it right now - your loved ones are appreciated far more than words can say. It's not just about my kids - it's about them all.
May God bless them...may He bless us all.

Thinking


Saturday is here and if there is one thing I love about going to bed on Friday night, it's that I don't have to get up early on Saturday morning. Can you identify?

This morning at 5:45, what was I doing?
Staring at the ceiling. So ends the Saturday morning sleep in - at least for this week.
It's a dark and rainy morning - but it's going to be warm so that's a good thing. I can work with most of the windows open.

I've had lots to think about this week with some possible changes in our future plans. Can't share them right now until the Army decides what their answer will be but it does concern Laurie and Stephen and Kasey so this gives me plenty to think about...early morning thinking when I am trying to get back to sleep...because it also concerns us; not to mention the fact that Scott has plenty going on as well. Never a dull moment around here but it makes our lives interesting.
Life sure can get uncertain sometimes - not that it's a bad thing. God has His own plan - but it would be more convenient if He would share it sooner. :)
Prayers for our family would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
God bless our troops - near and far. And those who love them.

Happy weekend everyone...today I am going to not think so much and stay busy.

Sue

Where to begin?

Hi friends.
Dark and early on Friday morning, Ron and I got on that big silver bird and flew home after 9 days of time spent with my sister, my brother in law and niece, and of course Laurie, Stephen, and Kasey. I cannot tell you how awesome this vacation was - and how truly relaxing and refreshing it was for us all. The time was a blessing - and the company we spent it with was a treasure.
There's not enough room on the internet to tell you everything - nor enough words to explain how it touched me - but tonight I will post about one of the most memorable days with the kids.
We went to Sea World - which just happens to be owned by Anheuser Busch and they are also one of the sponsors of the "Here's to the Heroes" campaign to benefit the Armed Forces. We were all given free entry into Sea World as part of that and the day was a blessing that could only have come from God.
As we sat in the grandstand - watching first the dolphin show and their bond with the human swimmers in the show - I sat there and cried at the shear joy of being there with Ron and the kids and Kasey. That we had these moments in time to be together - times that we will remember forever - was a blessing to my heart that cannot be explained. During the Shamu show, there was a spoken and video tribute to the military and their service...of course as the military and military families were asked to stand, it was a moment I will never forget. They are heroes one and all - your soldiers and mine...and those who are serving all around the world.
But as we ventured through the Magic Kingdom in the days to follow, I learned that heroes aren't all walking in the shoes of a soldier.
Some of them are riding in wheelchairs, using a walker, wearing a bandana to cover the loss of hair from chemo therapy. They are living with illness, loss of limb, numbered days because God has asked them to bear another sort of burden than our soldiers bear with their service.
Dolphins, Whales, seeing the kindness and beauty that CAN be found in human nature - all of these things are a treat to behold - and a miracle to witness. I noticed that - to a person - those who were riding in wheel chairs or wearing a bandana had no pain on their faces...somehow God allowed them to enjoy the experience and to lessen the burden of illness if only for a little while.
And so - here's to the heroes - the ones who serve our nation...and the others who face life each day with faith - and hope.
Blessings,
Sue

Gonna be gone - YAY!!

As I stare at my desk here at work and know that I only have a few more hours until I walk out of here - a free woman for 10 whole days - and heading for vacation, I can see that there's plenty to do here in the next 3 hours after lunch. It WILL get done. :)
But now, as my staff can see, I have one leg in the office, the other on my way to FL. Tomorrow Ron and I will be hugging lots of people we love - my sister, her hubby, my niece, and our soldiers and Kasey. We have been waiting a long time for this - a LONG time. I know it's going to go quickly, but it's going to be wonderful while it lasts. You probably won't see me here for awhile, but know you understand.

As I leave, I know that there are many loved ones in danger around the world - who serve despite the dangers, and face them with courage and conviction. May God bless them all - and may He keep them safe...Lord, please bring them home soon, safely to their families. This will be my prayer while I am away - the one thing that won't change from each and every other day that I am home.
God bless you all - and I will see you soon.
Blessings,
Sue

The Power of a Cookie.



Yesterday I was kind of upset with Scott - not angry upset, just concerned upset. I wanted to have a really good, long talk with him. With his late night work hours and my work hours and early wakeups, I feel like we are ships passing in the night. Know the feeling?

So, I had it all planned - what I wanted to say to him, my concerns, (and I could already hear the "MOM, YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY!" ) and all the things that a mom needs to say to a son sometimes.
Yesterday was Scott's day off - I asked Ron if we could take him to a show or DO something with him. It's important to Scott too - but a younger person doesn't always realize the value of quality time like us older folks do. He is learning that though - by spending the weekends with Veronica - time is very precious to him then.

Well, at least we had great conversation during dinner (a great dinner, too, thanks to Ron). When we were done, I said to Scott and Ron - "we should play a game tonight."

Typical reaction from Ron; "She's just asking that cause there's no SABRES game on tonight."

And from Scott: "Mom, you know I'm not into board games."
Sigh. No game.
But as I was putting a few things away in the pantry, I came across a package of chocolate chip cookie mix that I bought a couple of weeks ago - I like making homemade, but once in awhile it's ok to cheat. :) And so, the oven went on, the cookie sheets came out and I got busy. Less than half an hour later, Ron came strolling through the kitchen...and stopped at the cookie sheet just out of the oven.

I said "they're too hot!" He asked if they were actually for us. I told him he could have one if he was good. :) Hollering up the stairs to Scott in his bedroom that there were fresh chocolate chip cookies available in the kitchen, I got an immediate response...'be right down,' and, 'I thought I smelled something baking down here.'

The happy look on his face when he bit into the cookie gave me this absolutely contented feeling. He's eating the cookie and I am contented? You betcha.

Of course I mentioned that the cookie came with a price...and he immediately paid me with a huge bear hug. He knows his mom well.

One day I might still have the talk with him. But so often, actions speak louder than words.

For now, the power of a cookie is wonderful - and I am still smiling.

God bless our troops and those who wait.

Sue

Things unseen.

Hi. My friend at work and I were talking this morning - she has lots on her plate right now in her personal life and she is doing some brave things to make it better. She said that she heard a mom talking last night about a daughter who is about to be deployed - and the mom is frightened. Very frightened. I can identify. Oh, can I identify. And my friend thinks I am brave. I looked at her incredulously. Me? Brave? Not really - just riding the roller coaster and looking at a BIG hill. For a military mom, climbing the hill is a lot tougher than the downward ride. You can see ahead of you when you're going downhill.
With all that is going on over in the sand right now, not just with troops but with American contractors, it's enough to make a military mom hibernate...go into some sort of deep sleep until it's over. But that's a long time to be away from life. We don't know how long it's going to go on - nor do we know how it will affect our lives.
And so, I realize that instead of dwelling on the fact that Stephen is going to be in the midst of all of it in just a few months, I need to keep one of my favorite Scripture passages ever close in heart and mind:

"Now faith is the substance of all things hoped for; the evidence of things unseen." Hebrews 11:1

Things unseen, and faith - they MUST go hand in hand. Faith is in the empty cross and in the open tomb. Because He who occupied both is alive. Since God can do that, His Word is certainly true.

Oh and to my friend... (you know who you are): brave is what you are doing too. Don't ever forget that, ok? And you know that you have friends walking with you, don't you?

With prayers for our loved ones who serve, not just those deployed, but all who serve. Remember that you are missed - and loved. But you'll never know how much. Only our Father in Heaven knows that. The One who watches over you.

Thanks for stopping by. Your prayers are appreciated.

God bless our troops - and those who wait.

HE IS RISEN!!

Yesterday, we waited.

The cross was empty.

Today, the TOMB is empty and HE IS RISEN.

HE IS RISEN INDEED!

God bless your Easter Day.

Sue

Waiting


Last night I went to our Good Friday service at church. It's one of those services that can't be missed - because it's message can't be heard enough. Pastor had asked me to be one of the readers - there were six passages and he asked me to find two other ladies to read and assign two readings to each of us. The text, of course, was from John 18 and 19. The betrayal in the garden, the trial and Pontius Pilate's efforts to save Jesus, and the crucifixion. The story never gets repeated enough, and never ceases to put a lump in my throat as it's being read. I was thankful that the Word got past that lump as I read.
Today, we wait. We, as Christians, know that just as we grieved yesterday, tomorrow we will rejoice. We know that on this the second day of Easter weekend so many centuries ago our Savior slept in a tomb, and on Easter morning, He would arise.
And, on the same day He arose, he would walk down a road to Emmaeus. How many, like Thomas, need to see the wounds in Jesus hands and side to believe God's glory in Jesus' resurrection? Thankfully, we who are Christians do not need to see those wounds.
We just believe.
My friend at church told me a cute story last night. She said that she mentioned to her young grandson that yesterday was the day when Jesus died. He looked at her and with a serious face said, "Already? He was just born!"
Christmas, Good Friday, Easter, Sunday mornings. No matter when we attend worship, the theme is a comforting one. Jesus. To a small child, Jesus may still seem like a newborn because we just celebrated His birth. For us grownups, we know that my friend's grandson will be learning many things about Jesus as he grows up...and he will learn that the road between birth and crucifixion was quite a journey. Thirty three years or so, but oh the amazing ministry.
On this day, the in between day when we consider Jesus' death and anticipate the glory of Easter morning, may we all know and realize, that the best is yet to come.
For all of us who call on the name of the Lord, yes, the best is yet to come. Not just for Jesus, but for our lives as well.
Blessings,
Sue

The kindest thing...

Hi everyone. Today was a better day at work - whew, yesterday was a disaster. Just transition issues as we close one financial aid year and begin another. It's always hectic, sometimes stressful, but ALWAYS a challenge, and I do love a challenge. (well I usually love a challenge). But today is also a sad day for our family.
My sister just called. Her doggie Spencer - a beautiful golden Retriever - died yesterday after a battle with oral melanoma. She couldn't bring herself to call yesterday - anyone who has walked in the shoes surely understands that. Spencer was a true and literal case of puppy love.
When Michelle first adopted Spenc, he was an abused and malnourished animal, only a couple of years old. Chelle and Bob gave Spenc 10 years of absolute and unconditional love, as well as a silly, lovable, spoiled Llasa Apsu (sp) "sibling" who helped him create havoc time and time again. But yesterday, Spenc was tired, and stressed, and ready for them to allow the kindest act a pet owner can chose. And so, with the advice of a very loving vet, they did the thing that we as doglovers do - with broken hearts. When Chelle called me tonight, I wasn't much help as I sobbed right along with her. How do you console someone who has just lost their best friend? You look in your heart and remember the pain of 19 months ago when our own Shelby went to sleep. And you remember that it takes time - that 10 years of love can't be erased by a visit to the vet's office. I love you Chelle and Bob and we loved Spenc.
Don't mean to be low or sad, but sometimes we just need to remember the life of a good friend. I am thankful that we have the choices we do - that mankind can give these kind and timely gifts to our best friends when God has chosen.
But it sure doesn't help the pain. I guess the pain is a reminder of how kind and full of Grace God has been to have let us know these furry creatures.
I know that there are animals in heaven - I can't wait to see all our old furry friends.
Thanks for letting me remember Spenc. There should have been a picture posted but I couldn't load it from the email Chelle sent. Sorry Spenc - your beautiful face should be part of this post.
Blessings my friends.

Go, grandma, go!!

Hi everybody. Two weeks since I last posted but I have a very good reason - we were visiting Laurie, Stephen, and Kasey. What a wonderful visit it was - oh my, to see them again was great.
And what do you suppose I did when we were there? I went to the playground with Kasey and climbed up a rope ladder to the slide platform and went down the slide several times. Kasey was yelling out, "Go, grandma, go!!" and he was pushing me down the slide as I sat at the top trying to get up my nerve (teehee, not really, but I haven't been on a slide - or a rope ladder for that matter) in a long time. It was wonderful. Then, because the playground wasn't busy, Kasey and I had a derby of sorts by taking all his toy cars, putting them at the top of the slide and then letting them vrooom down the slide. Hmmm...his cars always won. Do you think he kept giving me the ones with bad wheels?
They have so much on their plate right now and are so busy, but they always manage to spend time together. Kasey is a very loved little boy and with the pending issues the Army has for them, their first thought has always been his care.
I did something highly unusual this trip - I did NOT access my office email or voicemails. A first for me in like the last 5 years or so. When I announced that at our staff meeting on Thursday, my first day back, there was applause because I always get hollered at for doing these things while I am on vacation. This time I decided to make every moment count.
Veronica is here this weekend - Scott had to work today so we took Veronica to breakfast and then went and looked at some RVs. A good morning.
Today is my birthday - it's a quiet one but good all the same. I don't know if we are going out for dinner tonight or if we will be having leftovers. Nobody has mentioned it, so I could be making the leftovers. Anyway, 61 isn't a bad age - sweet 16 reversed? Tomorrow I will bake some cookies to put in an Easter package for the kids. There are a ton of things to do around here but not sure if they will get done this weekend. Getting the kids' package in the mail Monday is most important. There's always next week, right?
It's good to be home..
Blessings to all of you - and to those we love who serve.
Sue

We all have a story.

Our lives.
They can be busy, or quiet; problematic, or trouble free; plenty in the pocket book, or just getting by. No matter what our lives bring us from day to day, well, we all have a story to tell. Are we supermoms who try to get it all done? Get our kids to school in the morning, then soccer practice and gymnastics after school, all while having a scrumptious dinner in the crock pot at home...and oh yes, this is after working all day at the office and driving in rush hour traffic for heaven only knows how long. Are we on a merry go round - or is this living life at it's fullest? Although the mom taxi thing is pretty much behind me, I remember it as a time of having the chance to have one on one time with Scott and Laurie.
I've had occasion to take stock of my life lately - guess it's because I am in my sixties now - not far into the sixties, and about to go a little further with my birthday being in a couple of weeks - but I'm there just the same. :)

And this sixty thing is just fine with me. Counting the months (and days) til retirement, yet really struggling when I think about the day I turn in my keys to the office, dust off my desk one last time, and walk out the door. My job has been a really comfy niche for a long time...but it's not all of my story. It's just a really comfortable place for me to be, and I love my co-workers-every single one of them. Like I said, leaving there won't be easy. Will cross that bridge when I get to it. I suspect there will be enough tears from me to flow like a good sized river underneath that bridge. You know how I am.

Veronica is here this weekend as usual. She seems to be a little different these days - discovering her own little personality, I guess. All of this can't be easy for her so we give her a lot of latitude. It takes a day for her to get rid of the defensive nature that she seems to have taken on...don't know if it's school, or Luke - he's a big boy and can be not nice to her sometimes.

Brothers and sisters...we are all alike with our sibs when we are little. It takes a long time for us to realize that we love each other. Once we are beyond the wrestling and the name calling...well, you have probably all been there at some point if you have brothers or sisters, or kids. :)

Life is going to be a little quieter for the next week or ten days as we visit Laurie, Stephen and Kasey. It's a trip we badly need, I think. Almost done with the book for Kasey....all the plans are laid down, just the printing of the pages and putting them in the book. I hope he likes it. (I sure enjoyed doing it not to mention the visits to the craft stores :).

Shopping today for last minute things for our trip - and one more gift for Kasey, but the weather is NOT shopper friendly. Cold, windy, snowy. Still, it's always fun when Scott & Veronica, and Ron & I hit the streets and the stores together :)

Sometimes I wonder what will unfold over the next few years - I think of the things that are in our immediate future - that affect us all. Presidential primaries, elections in November, the rising cost of gasoline, and most importantly for those who serve (and their families), the war in Iraq. For my family, I think of deployment looming, divorce for Scott and Tina, retirement and traveling for Ron and I. Perhaps putting that part on hold for a year while Laurie attends school and Stephen is deployed and Kasey comes to live here with "handma" and "handpa." God has it all in His very loving hands. Sure glad that I don't have to worry (she says convincingly).

That's the best part of our story, no matter who we are. He is the Author - we the characters. It may be somewhat unclear, but it's His perfect will. No matter how our stories play out - yours and mine - may God continue to bless you and your family.

God's Peace my friends and may He bless our troops - and those who wait.